Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy story
by Valkyrie skye
Summary: (1xR) Knowing about the life of the Gundam pilot Heero Yuy will you understand why he is the way he is
1. the natural born killer

_"Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two equals four. If that is granted, all else will follow"_

_-Winston Smith "1984"_

Past Destructions, Future Rebirths

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy's story

Chapter 1: the natural born killer

July 10, AC 204

ES1008 cluster of the L1 colony

If you were to ask this man, this 24 year old, recent college graduate, what he intended to do with the next 40 years of his life, the answer I guaranteed would have been anything but working for a interplanetary security and intelligence agency such as The Preventers. Majoring in Technological engineering with high honors in the Colonial University: L1 branch, he knew, and probably intended to work in the colonial technology department of L1. Busying himself for 40 years on making the colony better by upgrading weather systems, manage and running efficiently air ventilation structures and guarding the gravitational thrusters so that L1 could stay in orbit. He could probably do so much for his colony with his talents and his brilliance.

So what, in all places, is he doing in the L1 Intercolonial spaceport with his bag of a few clothes, necessities, and his laptop forsaking the job he intended and trained for 4 years to have for a spot in the Preventers?

It's a question he often asks himself since the last two weeks. He sits in the spaceport diner, letting the Turkey and Swiss on rye cool and remain half eaten as he takes the large cup of the now lukewarm black coffee, bare of any sweetness and dark as a hopeless nightmare and took some of it down with one bitter swig. Placing it down on the shoddy wooden table, Heero reflects about the past two weeks.

He remembered that after graduation, he was in his dorm room, his place of sanctuary for the last four years. And as everyone made their tearful goodbyes to one another outside his room, recounting their most memorable moments and their promises to never forget their friendship, he packed his clothes in such a speed while the cab driver outside picked the skin of his fingernails in the vain attempt to be patient for his client. The beep of his opened laptop resonated in a quiet sound amidst the loud voices outside and dutifully he went to it as a parent tended a sick child. An animated mailbox showed him of his recent e-mail delivery. Opening it, his eyes immediately greeted the stalwart insignia of The Preventers Agency. His eyes stood half lidded in conceit. He knew who sent this. But he was sparked with a bit of curiosity. Why would Chief Commander Une send him an E-mail right now? They were never really close. He doesn't even consider her as an acquaintance, but more like a well-known stranger.

Nevertheless, he begins his reading, and as he does his eyes grew a little bit wide.

"_Dear Mr. Yuy,_

_From the entire staff of The Preveneters Agency Main Headquarters of Luxembourg, I extend my greeting of congratulations to you in your recent graduation from college. Let me inform you that The Preventers Agency here in Luxembourg is looking to hire maximum-security officers for the ESUN governmental body. Our position offers paid-for housing, personal transportation, and a retirement pension as well as medical coverage and a starting high annual salary. Please respond to us as soon as you receive this letter for your answer to our proposal._

_Sincerely,_

_Chief Commander Anne Une_

_Preventers Agency: Luxembourg Main_ _headquarters_

The letter was concise and to the point. Very much like the person who wrote it. He read it again, but he knew from the first reading that when she mentioned "ESUN governmental body" he knew to whom she was referring to.

In the spaceport, placed on the worn metallic chair next to him, on top of the naugahyde red seat covering, sat today's "L1 times" with a picture of the young ESUN president. The photo was taken during an address last night to the ESUN senate meeting in London to discuss a new bill allowing families of former MO-III resource satellite construction workers to receive compensation from the time that the former Earth Alliance controlled colonial development. During the year of AC193, the world bared witness as colony rebels known now as the Maganac Corp. infiltrated the satellite in the attempts to rescue the workers to whom the public found out that they were seriously underpaid (indeed many never got paid at all.) and was gravely mistreated (1). Though rescued, the families still suffered through financial burden, as many of the workers found hard to find jobs in the Alliance supported countries of earth.

The picture itself was taken from a popular cable news network and it explains the rather lively expression of The President as she spoke to the audience of delegates and news reporters. He stared at her eyes first, blue as the earth itself and just as alluring. He noticed one time that the pseudo-skies of the colonies aren't as blue as hers and for some reason he cannot explain, that thought frightened him. Heero remembers her face countless of times. In personal memory and through innumerable appearances in television news reports and news talk shows. Making exclusive interviews with hosts that, however professional looking they might come off, a keener ear would notice that they knew little to nothing of her policies and what they do know, they know for the sake of ratings and to inflate their egos.

The one appearance that stood out in his mind took place 7 months back. In the warmth of his dorm room, Heero remembered that he paused from his "Modern Philosophy 121" assignment, taking only a moment to drink from his beer as he watched, with calm reverence, the ESUN president's inauguration ceremony. She was sworn before the eyes of the people to uphold the duties that come with being the leader of the world's nations until the conclusion of her term. When she swears, he can tell through those telltale eyes of hers that she means what she says. When the swearing in was done, the head of the ceremony came to the podium to announce the new ESUN president and as he did, the words, even to this day resonated within him as his heart swelled with something like pride and some other unknown warm feeling.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the new Earth Sphere United Nations President, President Relena Dorlian."

"Relena..." he whispered unconsciously, back at the diner. He brought himself out of the memory and looked around to see if anyone was listening. After finding out otherwise, he looks at his watch. 7:18 am. It'll be 36 hours before he'll touch terrestrial ground for the first time in four years...

May 15, AC 180

ES1001 cluster of colony L1

"Fuck" said the blonde haired man with the butcher blue eyes as he surveyed the mess. Amniotic fluid and blood littered the brothel floor and made a trail up the stairs to one of the cliental rooms in the upper floor.

A Japanese man next to him, limited in his English but understood the foul western words, nodded his head in understanding "Hai."

A woman came out of the room and stifled a gasp as she saw the two gentlemen. She looked behind the door and then back and cried, her hands outward towards them, begging in Japanese to leave the poor girl in peace for she is giving birth. The Japanese man shook his head violently and said in his native tongue "Then let the bitch give birth. We'll wait. Boss Tanaka wants his money, he's been far too lenient on her. He allowed her to sell drugs instead of her body because of her pregnancy and she owes him 868 units now. Either you get it or we'll come upstairs and welcome the birth with a .45mm in their heads." And as to show proof, he took out his Beretta from the holster in his jacket and waved it in the air. The woman nodded and went back inside while the young ladies gasped, and some yelp at the sight of the weapon and held on to each other for dear life. He turned to the young ladies and yelled "what the hell are you all doing?! Get to work! We got customers waiting out front!! Go on!" and at that, they scrambled towards the brothel's customer service quarters quite literally as if their lives depended on it.

Taking a seat at the plush red love seats, the Japanese man sat and sighed heavily looking at the door and then at the blue eyed man who still standing and said "How long do you think the bitch upstairs is gonna be on this?"

Though Caucasian, the man knew perfect Japanese and responded in an Asian eloquence "Birthing takes awhile, Akira-san. The mess here looks a bit dried so I suppose we'll be expecting the girl with her newcomer pretty soon."

The man snorted, "Who do you think is the father?" he chuckled.

"A lot of men come through here, Colonist and Alliance Specials officers alike. I wouldn't doubt that the father is either in one of these colonies or out on earth." He stopped. He didn't felt much like talking anymore to this man. He knew that this man, this Akira, hated him with all his heart. He hated the simple fact that the head of the Japanese mafia in the L1 colonies employed a white man in their ranks. And out of all of them, Akira was the one partnered with this white man, this 'Odin-san' but to the man named Odin, It was alright. When you have the support of the head of a powerful mob group, somehow, silly things like this didn't really mattered much to him.

Every so often, the woman would come out pleading for the men to be patient and going back to the room. After a few indescribable hours, the woman came out, sheepishly and looked at the men. "She's done." She simply said.

The two started towards the stairs and when inside the rooms. It was one of the rooms they dubbed "the special room" in which the wall, upholstery, and objects of sexual matter was littered all over in the blood red color of desire. Upon the large bed where the blood of the birthing and the natural red of the sheets appeared to be different in another light so that it seems like two different reds, laid a young Japanese girl. Sweat and tears in thin sheets around her face as she looked at the people entering the room. In her arms cradled a healthy crying baby. Her dark eyes looked at Akira and she found his face to be too cold for her. She looked at Odin and thought it be better to keep her eyes on him.

"Congratulations." said Odin.

"Domo." She whispered.

"Well, if you two are quite finished, you probably know why we're here." Akira added with a smug smile "and in case you are wondering, it isn't because of the baby."

The woman in the back wanted to protest but was quelled by a calm glance from the girl on the bed. She cradled her baby to sleep and said in a low voice, "In my drawer...is 300 units. That's all I have for this week. You must understand that I couldn't get more because of... well..." she looked down at her baby then looked back and said, "...you know."

Akira walked over to the drawer and took out the money. Counting it, he turned and looked at the girl "This is unacceptable. You know Boss Tanaka won't accept this."

"Well, with all due respect, Akira-san, you can tell Boss Tanaka that I could not meet his quota this week and that I'll make up for it next week when hopefully I'll heal to sell and fuck till I bleed again."

Akira took out his gun and pointed directly at her head, "Watch your mouth, slut." His voice a low growl "I just might carry Tanaka's order to shoot your head off a little preemptively."

Odin could not tell cause of the red lights in this room, but he can probably guess that her face was a little defiant. "I cannot produce money out of the air, what do I look like, a magician?" then she looked at her baby, a sleeping angel in this hellish room and then looked back at Akira, "Tell Boss Tanaka that if he will not believe me when I say that I'll make up for this disgrace, then he can take this baby for collateral."

"NO!" the woman said.

Akira looked at her and then the girl and he laughed, "For what need will Boss Tanaka have for a baby? He has a family already, three kids and an oblivious wife. Why would you wish to burden him with another mouth to feed?"

The girl sighed, "This is the best I could do. Either you can take the money and my baby boy, or kill me now."

In Odin eyes, things went far too fast. And yet as he stood there, his hands placed within in his coat pockets, he saw the events unfold in perfect detail. He saw as Akira raised his gun again and pointed at the general direction of the girl's head. He saw as the girl wrapped her skinny arms around the baby's head. He saw as the bullet came out from the barrel and went into her temples in a fantastic display of light and speed. On the other side of her head, blood exploded outwards and before he knew it, the girl's head hung lifelessly over the baby, who was screaming in fear of the loud noise. The woman screamed too and then fainted on the floor. The shock was too much for her to bear. Akira went to the baby and cocked his gun again when Odin stilled him on his arm. "I think you've done enough."

"Yes, and you didn't." he put the gun back into the holster and said "I cannot believe Boss Tanaka sent you with me when I've done all the work." He said smugly.

"And when were you going to give me the chance to speak? It seem you didn't want to stop talking like a big shot the entire time. Has it ever occurred to you that she might have stashed more money elsewhere and nobody knew about it? We didn't check how much coke she sold so how do we know the 300 was the only amount she had?" he walked over and looked at the baby and moved the arms away from the baby's head. The crying noise emanating from the baby's mouth shows that he was still alive. The girl threw her arms around the baby's head to guard his ears from the noise of the gun. Other than life, protection from deafness was the last gift she ever gave to her newborn. Odin continued "And for your information, Boss Tanaka sent me with you to baby-sit you. He said you had a happy trigger finger."

Akira growled, "I don't need your opinion, or your company, white-man. I can carry on fine by myself." He turned, taking a moment to grab the money and left. Odin still stood. Hands in his pockets as the woman was brought back to consciousness. She looked at the figure ahead of her, trying to see straight. As her eyesight came slowly back, she realized she was looking at the Caucasian man that came with Akira. A gasp first and a whimper and then she silenced, keeping her slanted eyes on Odin in horror.

Odin looked at her and said, "Are you all alright?" his voice a deep monotone.

The woman nodded her head jerkily and turned to look at the girl. Blood was oozing down from the hole in the girl's head and dripping on the baby. She let out a choked cry and looked at Odin and managed to say, "please. Leave me with the baby."

Odin looked at the woman then turned to the dead girl and said, "As I understood it, she was going to give the baby to Boss Tanaka and no one else."

The woman's voice was mingled with anguish and with question "But Akira-san refused. I heard it myself."

"Akira-san is not the Boss. He just acts like it. In truth, he does not know the wishes of Boss Tanaka. I doubt if he really knows him at all."

"Are you saying that Boss Tanaka will keep the baby? For what? She's dead. The bargain was made so to spare her life."

Odin turned to the woman and as he did, she swallowed back into silence "Nevertheless, she allowed us to keep the baby boy and no one else." He walked over to the girl. The stink of birth, blood and death is now clouding the room in a thick, sickening miasma. Taking the live baby out of the dead girl's arms, he re-wrapped the bed sheet around the baby's naked body and turned to the woman "I'll take him now."

"No! Please." She begged trying to get up on weak legs and held on to his arm as he was almost out the door "don't! I can take care of him, I could be his mother, please... don't."

But Odin shrugged out of her grasp and walked out of the room, out of the mob owned brothel and went out to the streets, baby in hand. The killer and the unnamed newborn with an unknown destiny.

To be continued.

(1) for those who don't know, that was in Quatre's episode zero


	2. the unwritten contract

Past Destructions, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy story

Chapter 2: The unwritten contract

May 15, AC180

ES1001 colony cluster of L1

Behind the large polished desk, Boss Tanaka's secretary eyed Odin and the little one in his arms with curiosity. She would occasionally look up and away so as to not attract attention, feigning paper work and typing. It was quite silent in the large room except for the small gurgling sounds coming from the little one in Odin's arms. It was quite comical if one was actually there. Odin is a large man. A thick neck and butcher blue eyes. Well-muscled arms holding something so fragile as a newborn with his large calloused hands. His face held a calm reserve during this, waiting for Boss Tanaka to free up his time.

She was looking again. Odin's deep voice resonated over the baby's gurgles answering her glance "You want to know about the baby. Yes, Minako?"

Minako feigned shock "No! No, why would I? It's not my business for me to know..." she looked down at her paperwork, straightening out the pile of papers in her small slim hands before glancing up back at the man in the seats. He gave her a half lidded stare before she said, "Ok. Yes. Yes, I want to know about the baby."

"Minako-san" the smooth voice resonated from a speaker COM on her desk. "Bring him in."

Odin stood up, baby in his arms, now a resting angel in a soiled red bed sheet. He gave Minako a mixed look of his usual stoic self integrated with a little mischief. "You'll probably find out soon enough."

Walking through the large polished sliding doors, Odin spotted the slim elderly man, his knees folded on the floor. In front of him was a small table decorated with small cherry blossom flowers and exotic birds carved delicately into the wood. On top of the table sat two small porcelain cups and a small porcelain decanter, both delicately designed and beautiful to behold. The slim elderly man stared out from his large window over viewing the scope of the large city as he spotted Odin by the door. He smiled and said in English "you would forgive me if I choose to speak in this language and you do not understand. I really must practice, as you may well know."

Odin slid the door closed behind him and bowed deeply to the slim elderly man. He stood back up after the greeting and responded in the same language "Practice does make perfect after all."

"Yes, it does, Odin Lowe. Please." He gestured for him to take his place across the small table, which he did, folding his legs and sinking into a seated position on the hard wooded floor holding the baby the entire time. "Sake?" he offered

"No, thank you." A silence, and then "I suppose you heard what happened."

Boss Tanaka took a sip of his Sake and placed it down on the table as slow as it was in a dream. Then his eyes, aged slits holding dark pupils rolled to the little baby in Odin's arms and said "somewhat." Then chuckled. Odin looked at the infant now, and noticed standing features of this child. Faint chocolate whispers of hair on top of his head, messy and unkempt. Eyes too small to be truly a westerner, but too large to be truly Asian. Looking into those eyes, he saw the pure color of the ocean deep within them before the little one closed them and went to sleep.

"Is he the whore's son?" asked Tanaka. Odin nodded. "Let me see him."

Odin passed the child gently to Tanaka and watched as the old man enveloped the infant with his aging arms. His face looked no different with the child now in hand. Tanaka's voice, a smooth smoky sound carried the question that was in his mind "He isn't purely Japanese, isn't he?"

"Not to my knowledge, sir." Odin said, "I doubt he is. Many men come into 'the Pink Delight.' He could be of some western origin, but we'll never know."

"Hn." He passed the child back to Odin and continued "You know I can't have a half-breed in my origination."

"You let me in your circle." And Odin smiled "And the last I checked, I'm nowhere near Japanese, let alone Asian."

Tanaka returned the smile and said "But you're good. You're damn good and you remind me of myself. But only you are an exception."

Odin nodded his head gently "I'm touched"

Tanaka sipped his Sake again "I'm glad. The others are not." Then placed his drink down and turned to face Odin again "is what I hear about Akira-san true?"

"Depends on how you heard it."

Tanaka sighed, "I heard that he threaten the whore, shot her and took all the money she claimed she had."

"That's the gist of it, yeah."

"He never bothered to search the place, check the amount of coke remaining, or interrogate any of her friends over there? He just took the bitch's word for it?"

Odin nodded.

Tanaka snorted "Baka."

Silence again. Tanaka looked over at the city once more, hawk eyes over what is now his territory. He over views the tiny streets below him where his drug dealers and his pimps with his whores sell human degradation at an affordable price. Where in the tiny shops, his protection dealers' offers security to store owners who wouldn't dare say no to their offer. Where his loan sharks are making a struggling entrepreneur dreams or nightmares come true. There are so much more that made him who he is. Made him out to be the man he is today.

Wealthy.

Powerful.

Fearful.

But Odin doesn't fear him. He fears no one and that, Odin supposed, is what Tanaka liked about him. Odin kept his eyes on the window as he said, "you know. We made a deal."

Tanaka nodded "Yes. Yes we did. I promised that this would be your last job with me and so it is." He shoved his hand inside his coat pocket and took out his checkbook. And after scribbling on it he handed the pale slip of paper to Odin, which he simply nodded upon looking at it and folding the check into his coat pocket.

"You feeling a bit generous, aren't you?" Odin said.

Tanaka shrugged "Generosity is just something one uses to wipes his ass with. You deserved it."

"Appreciate it." Odin stood up and after straightening himself out, he bowed deeply again. Tanaka eyed him with his aged hawk eyes, as if trying to see through him and asked, "Will you name the boy?"

Thoughtfully he answered, "She never gave him a name and since I'm not his blood parent, I don't feel like I have that right. I'll name him when the time suits me."

Tanaka shook his head "The next town has an Orphanage. Put the boy there and don't trouble yourself with something that's not yours, Odin."

"Thank you for your wisdom, Boss Tanaka. But I asked you for your check. Not your advice." Odin said kindly.

"It was freely given. You should not abstain it. In that case, will you raise him in the tongue of my people?"

"Its only fair."

Tanaka nodded, as if it were in approval. "Very well then, my friend." He said gently "Go then and live your life as the wind. Blow into the lands of elsewhere like you did before meeting me and take the boy with you" then he turned away from Odin, back onto the window and gazed into it as if the conversation and the man himself never existed. Odin turned with the nameless little one sleeping comfortably in his arms and left the extravagant office of Boss Natsuhiko Tanaka, never to return again.

In room 126 of the Holiday Springs hotel, Odin placed the phone on the receiver and walked over to the bed to see the little one busying himself with a little plastic toy. His mouth sucking on a new pacifier and dressed in new cotton outfit of little ducks and toy boats. His light cobalt blue eyes rolled to the tall man, addressing his presence by jiggling his toy. Odin looked at him, emotions unreadable as he placed his hands into his coat pockets. "You know," Odin began "you're not mine."

The baby just looked.

"I don't know who your real dad is, but if its any indication about his personality, He messes around with whores. Speaking of which, your mom tried to save you. I don't know your mom, but all I know is that she tried." Odin sat down on the bed and held up a little toy gun over the child's head, little hands trying to grasp at it. He continued "You and I, we're gonna make a deal. A contract. You'll understand this more when you grow up, but we gotta make a deal." Then he held the gun, slipping his large index finger into the trigger handle while the hand grasped the tiny plastic handle "You help me, do what I do, and I'll feed you, name you when it's appropriate, and do all that nice shit that people with kids do. But just remember this one thing." And he looked at the child again "You are not mine."

And the child stilled, putting his arms down gently and stopped sucking the pacifier. He just looked at the man and vice-versa and it seemed to Odin that the unnamed newborn understood.

The contract was sealed.

To be continued...


	3. the makings of a professional

First a Note:

1. I would like to thank those that reviewed and gave me great critiquing on this story. It was really helpful and I only hope that I could get more of those so as to help me with my writing in the future. Fanfic or otherwise.

2. And because I give credit where credit is due, the following authors and their works have (indirectly) help me shape Heero's story:

The works of Neil Gaiman (amazing fantasy author)

George Orwell's 1984

Lewis Caroll's through the looking glass (um, you'll find where the theme of that story plays into this later.)

David Meyer's exploring psychology

And finally, retired army ranger Lieutenant Colonel Dave Grossman's On killing: the psychological cost of killing in war and society 

Thanks a billion : )

Valkyrie

Past Destruction, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy Story

Chapter 3: The makings of a Professional.

January 19, AC 184

ES1014 cluster colony of L1

To Odin, the unnamed child is known as "the boy"

Mobility is something the boy is always used to, for all his young age. That, and a cold awareness of a non-identity within his infantile conscious. For as long as he can remember, Odin had always addressed him with one sort of name or another to suit the occasion. Edward, Remy, Jin, etc. At one point, he was referred to as Odin Lowe Jr. And when he was called that, he felt something warm dimly emanating in his heart. But that quickly died as he dismisses it as a hopeless fancy. A sense of longing to have an identity was, as he concluded, to be nothing more than child rubbish. And yes, even in that age, he knew what that was too.

Though only four, he never asked for a toy. Although one time not too long ago, to suit the appearance of a normal child, Odin had brought him a teddy bear. For show, the boy knew that for sure. But that feeling in his heart emanated once again. This feeling of warmth and joy and though now a bit of a worn down thing, he always carried it with him. A prized possession of cotton and cloth that was worth more than gold to him.

Never did he desire to play any games. By himself or with anyone. He did however watch other kids play games. Hearing their laughter and their joy reminded the boy of better days that should have gone by for him, but didn't. He carried within himself, a sense that something was stolen from him. Or something that was never granted to him but to other children around the world and across the colonies, something that he himself was exempted from. Possibly innocence, or joy. Maybe love. He, unlike any child, never coveted for much of anything and nothing in all the colonies matters much to him. Except he did have a high tolerance for animals, especially dogs. He eyes them daily at the local pet shop in the area he is currently living in. The boy watches as the two Doberman puppies inside the showcase pen play and tumble each other in a display of awkward rolls and feigned biting exhibiting a canine instinct older than humanity itself, the need to be on top. A winner and a leader no matter the cost. To them now, it's a game. But that furious need to stay a leader, win your territory, and your bitches will take over and there's no stopping it. The bites will be real and the fear from your enemies will radiate and make you stronger. Will make you a warrior...

Stay on top.

And that, the boy figures, is what he liked about them. They are now like him, young. But in the future, they will be furious animals, hungering for meat, females, and of the most basest of needs. They will, he figured at the age of four, be like him in the future.

But for now, in the current place of residence (I use the word "Residence" lightly for the boy has no sense of residence whatsoever in all his young life due to Odin's incessant need to move elsewhere.), the boy sits in the couch, holding on to the stuffed bear as he continued watching the news program Odin was viewing before he decided to make a call. In the background, Odin's voice died down within the boy's hearing as the voice from the television became more into focus; "Newly appointed Foreign Minister Cray McCarther along with his Vice Foreign Minister Richard Patrick Dorlain will be making their first political trip towards L2 to discuss a feared rise of diseases in the poorer parts of the space colony. The Vice Foreign Minister has been on the spotlight for quite sometime now due to his adoption of the young former Princess Relena Peacecraft of the ruined Sanq Kingdom. Rumor has it that the young Princess; now four years old, is still traumatized by the tragic death of her family and of her kingdom that she's is autistic. The Dorlain family's spokesperson is denying such claims stating that her mental health is in top shape and that she is as well and happy as any little girl her age would be."

At this point, the boy drowns out the voiceover of the spokesperson as the camera view focuses on the little princess, the boy's age. It was at a televised dinner summit held by the leaders of the Romafeller Foundation in which the Dorlains were cordially invited to attend. The image the news report used for the little princess came from that and as she was placidly looking at the speaker in the footage, the boy notice that he kept hearing the words "Normal", "Healthy", "Sane" to describe her.

Hearing heavy footfalls coming into the living room, Odin appeared. He stayed at the threshold between the bedroom and the living room and turned his head towards the TV, then to the boy on the couch and said "ya'know, you could of changed into cartoons. I wouldn't of mind."

The boy shrugged "The news is more interesting. And less fake."

"When you grow up kid, you'll find out just how ass backwards you were when it comes to the news." Odin snorted. The program changed subject from the Princess into a report about colonial events and, it seemed evident that the boy lost his interest in the news and changed it into cartoons. Odin looked and said "So what do you think about the Princess? She's your age and she's been through a shit load."

The boy stared into the screen. An animated dog found a stick of dynamite inside his bone that is just about to burst and let out a high pitch yell with large bulging eyes before bursting into flames. An animated cat (the obvious perpetrator) took out a stick with a marshmallow at the end from his back and began heating it up over the corpse of the flaming dog before giving a knowing wink to the audience. The boy did not laugh. Instead, he stared straight ahead into the screen and answered, "They say that she's normal. And healthy. And sane." Odin nodded. The boy turned off the television and turned his head to the man, slowly and gracefully. He had the look of an eerily placid child and the weight of the boy's stare seemed to bring the cold chill of death within Odin that he almost shivered. But he remained his composure in front of the child as the boy said, "she is not what they say she is."

"And what is that?"

"Healthy. Sane. Normal."

The look of curiosity chewed into his aging features "And how do you know that?"

"Her eyes." The boy said and calmly he continued, "Because her eyes are just like mine and I'm screwed up."

Odin laughed, "Yeah, I can see that. Well, enough talk about this. Do you know who I was on the phone with?" he jerked a thumb towards the phone in his bedroom and the boy shook his head. "I was on the phone with a new client." He walked over to the couch and sat next to the boy, "He has a job for me and that I gotta meet him at the 'El Santo' diner over at 57th street." The boy nodded and then Odin said, "The difference between this job and all the other jobs I had before is that this time, you get to come along."

A look of subtle confusion crossed the boy's face "I thought you always assumed that I wasn't ready."

"Yeah, I've said that before. But now I feel like you are." Odin stood up and walked towards the bedroom saying, "Hurry up and get dress, we'll be seeing this guy soon."

Odin walked towards his bedroom before he paused in his tracks at the sound of the boy's question "Odin. What is it that you do?" He turned to the boy as he continued, "you always take a gun with you and I know you have a lot. So what is it that you do?"

Odin smiled "You'll find that out later today."

* * *

All five colonies have their roots from the world leading nations of earth. It is common knowledge that the majority of the people living in each colony reflect those countries living on earth. Thus since the nation of Japan funded for the creation of the L1 colony, the vast majority of the citizens living there is Japanese. Same with the rest of them. The creation of L2 was funded by the Americans, L3 by the European Union, L4 by the Middle Eastern nations, and finally L5 by the communist nation of China.

And although since many of the stores, businesses, and sights are heavily Japanese influenced, there are many places where you can find a small minority of nationalities scratching their own living off the eastern Asian colony. Right now, Odin settles in a diner booth with the boy in the colony's well-known minority Spanish district. A half hour later or so, a nervous man came towards the table. He looked first at Odin and then at the boy across the other side of the table, frowning in confusion "You Odin?" he said towards the man.

To the man named Sam, the boy's name is Daniel.

He nodded "I take it you are Sam." Odin gestured to the space next to the boy and said, "This is my son, Daniel. Please take a seat."

Sam sat as requested and couldn't help but to look at the boy who was busy with his grilled cheese sandwich. He turned to Odin again and said, "Does the kid have to be here?"

Odin took a sip from his burning coffee, "He's learning the trade."

Sam's face paled against his white skin so it looked more whiter than it usually is "Oh. When you said you were bringing someone, I didn't know it was gonna be like that. Oh..." he looked at Daniel again and this time the boy looked back. He felt the glare of Daniel's cobalt blue eyes sear into his soul and he couldn't help but say harshly, "God. Don't look at me, kid."

"Stop it, Sam. He's just a kid. Anyways, wanna eat something? You sure as hell look like you need it."

He cast his eyes all about the table "I need a bottle of Jack, cause I'm about to lose my goddamn nerves." He looked up at Odin and said, "Are you sure you aren't a cop?"

Odin chuckled "No. And no, the kid isn't wired so you can relax"

"So much for my next question." Sam took a deep breath and said, "Ok, I dunno how to start."

"Start with what you want."

A waitress came by with a tall glass of water and set it before Sam to which he took plenty of it down in one big gulp. His hands were noticeably sweaty and his fingers set to the task of twisting and fiddling with the wedding band around his ring finger. He looked entranced at the dark gold twisting his reflection within the thick metallic body. "Jolene and I have been married for 10 years. We have two kids and good property. I have almost everything I could ever ask for."

"Almost?"

Sam stayed silent before he said, "I want you to get rid of Jolene."

Odin raised one blonde eyebrow "Oh?"

The man across the table let out a breath he had been holding "I invested in some shit-hole scam and now I'm broke as fuck!" he whispered harshly, "Jolene has over 10,000 units in her life insurance account. 10,000 units, Odin!" he took another gulp of the cold water in a fidgeting hand before saying "I just want you to blow her head off or something and don't let it get connected to me, you hear? If this thing pulls through, you get 10-"

Odin shook his head interrupting him "No.10 is bullshit, who the hell do I look like, your agent? Is this Hollywood? 10 is unacceptable"

"Come on, Odin! I need all the money I could get! I got debts to pay." At this point, his voice bordered on the edge of whining.

"50 Sam. 50 and I'll make it look clean."

Within a half an hour later, the three walked over to the parking lot. Reaching an old sedan, Sam opened the door to take out a picture of his wife to Odin "This is her. Tomorrow, she's heading to her sister's who lives in Suzumara Gardens. Keep it. Remember it and then burn it. When it's all over, meet me at Tenshi Park on Friday to get your money, got it?"

Odin nodded and turned without saying a word with the boy following suit.

* * *

January 20, AC184

8:47 PM

Across the street from the Suzumara Gardens apartment complex, Odin briefly smoked a cigarette before licking the pads of his fingers and extinguishing the tip. Then throwing it over to the streets below where it disappeared under the tires of the running cars. He then watched his 40-something year old target laughing with her sister and taking coffee through high-powered binoculars. Beside him, the boy opened a case to reveal a Tactical-Ops tango-51 Sniper Rifle. Still with his binoculars, Odin said "If I were you, and you were me, and you were the one handling this mission here, what would you decide the best course of action would be?"

The boy looked at target and her company and "The best COA would be when the target's sister left the room. Using the advantage of our location and the open balcony, the mission would be a quick success."

Odin nodded "My sentiments exactly."

The boy turned to him "Is this what you do?"

"Hm?"

"Kill people. Is that what you do?" he said emotionlessly.

Odin thought for a moment then said, "I kill my targets, yes. I don't necessarily kill people, per se. I'm not a serial killer. I have control over myself. My mind. We talk about this a lot in our time together so you should know. I never really lied to you when I say that death is my business. Except tonight, you'll witness first hand what I mean." He gave the binoculars to the boy and walked over to his gun, "Death is as necessary as life. We need it to feed as we kill animals for our food. We need it to make space in the world as a person dies, naturally or otherwise. We need it to realize the value of life, as someone dies a pointless death. Death is evil..." he pause, swallowing the Diazepam pills and readying his gun as the target's sister is about to head into the kitchen, and finished his sentence, "...But a necessary evil nonetheless."

The boy held his breath as he watched Odin's trigger finger stilled in waiting, in conjunction with the rising opportunity of completing his mission. A few steps into the kitchen from the woman's sister is all that separated from now into her death.

"How," the boy asked "could Sam pay you on Friday when he's leaving tomorrow?"

Odin's eyes left his target and lay upon the boy, his face silently asking him to explain. The boy started, "yesterday, when he opened his car door, I saw shuttle tickets to L3 on the right side of the diver seat. The date said 'January 20, AC184' at around 10 PM... Didn't you spot that?"

His eyes never left the boy after this confession. Instead, he smiled and put down the gun. He removed the articles of the weapon and carefully placed them back into the case. Closing it and carrying it in one hand, he said "How about some pizza, Boy?" Then he took the child's hand and they both left the roof of the building.

* * *

January 21, AC 184

3:35 AM

Pulling the boy out of his deep sleep was Odin. He nudged the boy and commanded him to wake up. He sounded different. He woke up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, holding the teddy bear loosely around his left hand "What?" he asked

"Get up. I want you to see this."

The boy slid out of bed, holding the bear and followed Odin out into the living room, the man's heavy footfalls echoing over the boy's little padded feet. When they emerged, the boy found Sam in the living room. Bounded by the ankles and wrist with gray tape and rope fast to a chair. His mouth covered by tape and his eyes, puffy and wet with tears widen at the sight of the boy. He groaned.

"Now, at times" Odin began, talking to the boy as a teacher would to a learning student, "we're gonna get people that will try to outsmart us." He began to walk over to the hallway closet, still talking "In this case, we see Sam giving us a job but not fulfilling his part of the bargain. That part which requires him to pay for our hard working services." He took out an iron box and inserting a small key, "Luck would be on my side tonight as the L3 flight, I was told when I contacted the Spaceport, was delayed until 12:10 AM and wouldn't you know it? I found him in the gate, his bags all packed waiting for the delayed shuttle flight." He took out a SOCOM gun and as he attached the silencer, the man wailed at the sight and strained against his bonds, "Boy, you should have seen the looks on his face when he saw me." He grinned, "Times like these that I live for this shit, huh?"

"Now, in case you are wondering, boy, how the hell I got him out of the Spaceport and in this apartment is really a matter of logic. What's the most easiest way of getting someone to come quietly with you in a place that can detect guns and other weapons?"

The boy sat far across from Sam on a four-legged chair, his padded feet kicking air, as he couldn't yet reach the floor, "You poisoned him?"

Odin nodded "People thought he had a bit too much to drink in the spaceport bar lounge." He walked over to the living room, gun in hand. At this time, the man cried. His sobs muffled by the tape, his pant were growing wetter with his urine. Odin turned to the boy, "My eyes are getting old. Thanks for the tip off. Ever heard the Ballistics Shock Effect?"

The boy shook his head.

"Ok, well it goes a little something like this." Odin aimed the gun quickly pulled the trigger having a bullet enter his brain. The effect of the closeness to the shot and the target cause a large splatter of blood on the boy. He raised his arms to guard the splash of blood and it stained his hair, face, clothes and teddy bear. A long passing of seconds occurred before the boy slowly put his arms down, eyes wide as the sheets of blood poured and dripped from his face and hair. Odin too was stain, but the boy was closer to Sam, who just sits now. Lifeless. A large hole in his head oozing blood and shredded brain gore. Hearing the footfalls again, the boy pulled out of his shocked dazed and look to Odin who was placing his weapon and its contents back into the box. He felt the stare of the child and looked up to his wide eyes. He simply resumed the task at hand and said, "Go, clean yourself and get to bed. You got school tomorrow."

And the boy did nothing else. It was a school night after all.

To be continued...

**Next update: Saturday, October 1 2004**


	4. chapter 4 teaser

* * *

Oh god. I'm sorry. I'm super sick, and I'm super busy (today's schedule consist of the following: Orientation for my new job, taking care of my nephew, catch up on college work cause I'm so flippin' behind. And finish chapter 4. All in a 24-hour period.)

However, instead of brushing you guys off with some lame ass apology, I'll give you guys a teaser. The following dialogue takes place a couple of months before Heero's episode zero and is between his 7 year old self and a woman name Frieda. Just who the hell is Frieda? Without letting out too much, she'll be the one setting the foundation to Heero's intimate relationship with Relena in the near future and that's all I'm gonna say.

So without further ado, here is the "past destructions, future rebirth" act1: chap 4 teaser

* * *

Frieda wiped her hands with the kitchen towel cloth after setting down the slice of chocolate pie to the boy. He took the fork and eagerly ate away at the dessert. He paused when hearing the silence and looked up at the woman across from him. Frieda looked preoccupied, her green eyes frown in worry. The silence was quite heavy and though he only spoke in a small voice, it seemed loud in the presence of this thick stillness "Is there something wrong?"

Frieda looked up, alarmed and then smiled and said "no. No, nothing is wrong." She murmured, "how's the pie?"

"Good. Thank you."

She smiled in gratitude. Silence blanketed the room once again. She fumbled her fingers and forced herself to ask what was in her heart. "Hey. Um... How's Odin?"

The boy looked up. He seemed a bit shocked but played it off as if it was nothing "He's fine."

"Oh. That's good." She paused "Is he getting my calls?"

The boy nodded

"Oh. Ok. I suppose he must be really busy to call me back." She said and as she said that, she frowned even further.

The boy observed that change in her demeanor. She seemed... sad. But why? She turned to look at the boy again, but this time, she brighten up a little "Ya'know, one of these days, you're just gonna wind up doing something really stupid. I mean everyone does something stupid, but it's the measure of that stupidity that really matters. It's the measure that you get judged for.

"One day, you'll meet someone. We all do. And when you do, and she looks past your stupidity. Looks at you and see everything that's good about you, then I want you to promise me something. Please."

The boy stared. No one had ever talked to him with this much intensity. His eyes asked to continue.

"I want you to do all you can to keep her in your life. Because people who can look past your big flaws are very, very hard to come by." And then she sadly smiled, "They are one in a million, kiddo. Don't forget that."

* * *

Ok, that's all I got for ya. Hopefully I'll finish this today but if not, then tomorrow.

Thanks

Valkyrie


	5. Frieda

My apologies for the wait.

Past Destruction, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy story

Chapter 4: Frieda

April 7, 187

ESC1029 colony cluster of L1

The street is most familiar to Odin now. It was quite unusual. He always seem to move to another place every 2 to 3 months. He had been in the same neighborhood for close to a year now. It was the longest stay the boy had ever felt in his entire short life. Speaking of which, Odin drives down the street towards Ken Yamaoka elementary, picking up the boy when he heard the chanting. He heard it coming into the street, blocks away. It was growing louder as he came closer to the source. In front of the UESA L1 Specials Military Academy were a large group of college protesters holding signs and chanting loudly "HEERO YUY MUDERERS! CONFESS, CONFESS!"

The signs all bared his face, a kind and gentle image of the fallen peace advocate. The slain hope of the colonies. Zealous protesters being held back from the entrance by officers and riot police held blown-up pictures of better days gone by under his leadership.

Today marks the 12-year anniversary of Heero Yuy's assassination and Odin hated this day with a passion. He hated it for 12 years since. He sat in his driver seat, entranced as the protesters chanted and cried and angered over the passing of this one man. This one man whose life was taken way. Their beloved martyr. By a heartless monster with no regard for human life. He ran his worn hands through his head. How long will he carry this in his heart? He still sees it in his mind. He could have sworn that he could still hear the silenced muffle of the sniper rifle as it fired into Representative Yuy's head. The blood staining concrete while the body fell and people everywhere was running for their lives.

That one bullet changed everything. Ever since then, riots broke out. Waves of Alliance armed forces spread throughout the colonies like a virus since then. In every corner, you'll see an armed officer ready and waiting for someone to step out of line. Communications to the other colonies was cut off. In the year following, he saw the true power of the Alliance military might with the introduction of the first mobile suit. Huge machines that was made from the stuff of nightmares.

And though he hated this day, it was not because he was a political man. It was not because he cared for the colonial cause for independence. It was because of what it brought. Nothing, he knew then, is for free. Death, no matter how insignificant the person may seem to be, had its price. And the price for Yuy's passing was far too big.

A horn honked from behind him pulling him out of his reverie. Divers behind him yelling in Japanese profanity ordered him to 'move his ass' Odin simply mumbled and drove off. As he does, one cannot help the horrible irony in this...

The man that killed Heero Yuy, the beast that all colonists wants his head on a platter (especially those protesters on the streets), just drove off behind them to pick up his ward from school.

* * *

Sunsets are quite useless in the colonies. There's no ecological necessity for it. But for as long as humanity was conscious enough to appreciate the daily, fading lights of the sun, people have lived with it for so long that one cannot seem to picture life without it. It was the generosity of the early constructors of the colonies to technologically recreate the vast purples and pinks coalescing with the yellow of the artificial sun.

However the boy, now 7, found them utterly, completely, and fully worthless. It was already evening, and after finishing his homework, he went to his room to do what he usually does to past the time. Next to the old teddy bear (of which still faintly reeked of its first blood shower 2 years ago and still had some reddish-brownish stains all over its worn out cotton skin.) was a little box. After unlocking it, the boy took out from the inside his very own Glock 34 9x19 caliber handgun. It was his very own weapon given to him by Odin this past Christmas. A present to the boy because according to Odin, he was getting better.

And he was. His first kill took place two months after the Sam incident. When they moved to another part of L1, Odin had him shoot at animals first before getting him use to killing people. It was easier with a sniper rifle, the boy deduced. You were not close to your target and somehow, that made things better. You were not up close to see the blood splatter, to hear the sound of the bullet slicing its way through the body. And Odin made him feel better about this too. It was easier, far easier to refer them as "your targets", that's what he would call them. His targets. Because it was far easier to pull the trigger when you refer them as "targets" and not "human being" and it that was the only way the boy could sleep at night. And ever since then, he slept quite well.

The boy, in his room holding his unloaded pistol turned to the clock. It was soon to be 9 PM. He didn't know how long was he in his room for and didn't care. The boy decides to head off to sleep because in his heart, sleeping was far better than staying awake. He thinks about that for a second. And for a brief moment, he thought about the possibility of sleeping forever. Unloaded anyways, he raised the Glock and pressed it cold barrel against his temples and closed his eyes. 7 Years old...

Sleep forever... 

"Hey." Odin's voice called through the wooden door and his heavy knuckles knocked against the surface penetrating through the silence of his room "You sleeping, boy?"

He put away the gun and opened the door. "No. What is it?" he replied tersely.

Odin dressed in Dockers, a casual shirt, and a dark tan leather coat stood there, a smirk on his lips said, "I'm going out tonight."

The boy knew that. For the past 2 months, Odin had been heading out into the night for reasons other than business. He knew that, and didn't care. The boy replied, "Have a nice night." and turned back inside.

"I want you to come with me."

The boy paused. He turned to Odin, his eyes unreadable and said, "Oh. So its one of those things... I'll get my gun."

"No. Its not one of those things. Tonight isn't for bloodshed. I just gotta pick up somebody from work. That's all."

He stood, confused as he stares at his mentor "Why would I be needed?"

"Listen, I never taught you to ask questions, did I? So then why are you asking now? Tonight is just to relax, meet someone, and eat. No business. No weapons. Just relax. How 'bout it?"

Looking as if he was contemplating through a difficult math problem, the boy finally replied, "Give me 5 minutes. I'll be right out."

"I'll be in the car."

* * *

When he parked, the boy, sitting in the backseat, looked at the surroundings with perplexity. It was odd. The parking lot was stained yellow by the streetlights. Everywhere, men, both drunk and sober where coming in and out from the building across the street. The building itself was just as bizarre. There was large tinted windows in front of the establishment with a neon sign boasting it's business "GOLDFINGERS: THE REAL GENTLEMEN'S CLUB." with a silhouetted voluptuous woman on the bottom.

"What the hell are we doing here?"

"Picking someone up, now stay here and don't get out of the car." He shifted his weight and opened the door, "I'll be back soon with our companion and then we'll head off for some food." Then he quickly shut the door behind him and the boy watched as Odin walked into the black doors. If his eyes weren't so tired, he would of seen him actually jogging to the doors.

Sleep was getting the better of him. He no sooner fell asleep as Odin stepped foot into the club.

Stepping into the foyer and looking out onto the wide room before him, he smirked at the scene. Everywhere, the building reeked of lust. Men in the bar being served drinks by large breasted, barely dressed women. Alliance officers sitting in tables, many receiving gratuitous lap-dances from girls looking young enough to be barely legal. Maybe they were, maybe not. It didn't matter. They were giving them what they wanted. Most of the men in the room were sporting rock hard erections watching the event on the mirrored catwalk; two girls in only their thigh-highs and heels in dancing to the music in awkward positions mimicking a sex act while the fortunate few stuff bills in their garters.

But this is not what Odin came for. No, in fact when the act was over, he walked closer to the catwalk anticipating the person he wanted to see. The performer who caught his attention and was able to stoke a fire within him in more ways than one. The curtains, opened up and the announcer proudly introduced their main attraction "SCHOOLBOYS, CLASS IS IN SESSION. PLEASE PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER AND YOUR MONEY FORWARD FOR MISS. SINN!!!"

And as if on cue, music blared out once again and a woman stride through the curtains, her long legs gracefully and sinfully strutting out onto the floor as her stiletto heels clicked to the sound of her footfalls. Dressed in a teacher's outfit complete with black-rimmed glasses, she lustfully looks out onto the crowd, slapping the ruler on her hand as her green eyes burrowing into each pair of eyes that got her attention. She paused at Odin. And then she wickedly smiled.

School was in session.

She grabbed on to the pole and danced erotically to the beat every so often looking to see if she had Odin undivided attention. And she did. Every article of clothing, from her blazer, to her blouse, to her skirt and even undid her red hair from a tight bun until she was in nothing except for her white garters and bra. She looked directly at Odin, who just stood on the floor in front of the catwalk, still as a statue. His hands were shoved into his coat pockets and his lips still held a smooth smirk. It drove her mad with lust. She walked over and knelt in front of him. She looked lustfully in his eyes, and unlatched the clasp in front of her lacy bra revealing her chest as she draped the bra around his neck and touched his lips with the tips of her fingers so subtly, he almost lost control and would of taken her right there, were it not for her leaving immediately to finish her act, but not before turning back and tossing him a wink.

* * *

In the dressing room, the stripper placed her money into her purse. Fully dressed now, she parted ways with her other performers and made her way outside the room where she knew just who was waiting for her in the hallway. Outside, she sees Odin and smiles before walking over to him and giving him a big kiss on the lips. "I missed you." She said.

"Same here. Come on." He wrapped an arm around her waist as they walked towards the exit and asked, "you hungry?"

The woman nodded "I could eat a horse."

"Well, horses is something I didn't have in mind when it comes to eating. But of course..." and he gently shoved her against the walls and nibbled in her ear, "I could always eat out something else." He chuckled.

"Odin!" she laughed before he removed himself from her and continued walking down the hall, his grasp still laid upon her waist.

"Yeah, I know, this ain't the time. Besides, I got someone waiting in the car."

"Oh yeah? Who?"

And he sighed out, "You'll see."

* * *

It was the sound of the car door opening and the rustling sound of fabric that drove the boy wake. His eyes flew open at the sound of the two people coming into the car. One of them he knew was Odin, but as for the other passenger, the boy can only guess that she was the companion in question. Hearing the closing of the doors, and getting settled in did Odin turn to the boy in the back and smirk.

To the woman in the car named Frieda, the boy's name is Isamu.

Frieda turn to Odin who was looking in the backseat and then turn to see the boy in the back. She smiled "Odin? Who's this?"

"This is my son, Izamu. Son, this is Frieda. She's..." he looked at her and his smiled broaden. Although the car was dark, her face blushed and inside her heart expanded. She felt so much joy and love when looking into his eyes. He finally finished, "someone very special."

There was obviously something in the air between them. Even Isamu could sense it, for all his young age. He looked at the pair with a sudden urge to say something, anything. It was strange to look at Odin. He acted completely different when he was around her. It's not entirely surprising to find Odin with a woman. He was known to have many females for as long as the boy could remember. But the only difference was that Odin always acted the same up until this point. Isamu couldn't quite place it, but could tell that Odin was a lot more... softer, in his demeanor.

Frieda turned to the boy in the back. She squinted in the dark to look at him and them turn the overhead light to get a better look at him. She took in a gasp and smiled brightly "Oh my god! Odin, he's adorable! Those blue eyes." she reached out and ran her slim fingers through his spiky brown hair "and such amazing hair! Oh..." and she tossed Isamu a sly smile "I can tell," She said as she wagged her finger at the boy "YOU, are going to be a real heartbreaker when you grow up!" The light brightens the car well enough to see the blush flourish in Isamu's cheeks. Turning then to Odin she asked "Isamu? Is that Japanese?"

Odin shrugged "My ex-wife is Japanese. She chose the name." He said rather convincingly.

The smiled was still on her face when she turned to Isamu once again. "Well, hello there. Nice to meet you, Isamu. Can I call you Izzy?"

The boy shrugged.

"Quiet, isn't he?" she asked Odin.

"He can be more quieter." Odin answered looking straight ahead as he turn the ignition on, "Anybody in the mood for take out?"

* * *

He didn't know when, but the boy fell asleep in the car ride back home. He didn't remember coming into the apartment, but he knew full well that the woman, Frieda, was still here. Isamu's eyes flew opened at the repeated banging sounds against his bedroom wall. The boy woke alarmed. And then in an instant, he grew confused. The sounds of the woman clearly were loud and alarming and coming from Odin's room.

Her voice permeated through the plaster, "OH GOD, OH GOD, ODIN!!!!"

The boy had a speculation of what was going on. But of course, what he knew about the subject was as much as a church going person knew about killing. Absolutely nothing. However, what he did knew was that it was keeping him awake and he couldn't go back to sleep.

So 7-year-old 'Isamu' lay wide awake against his bed, trying his best to sleep against the sound of the couple next door.

* * *

Weekend mornings after a night of wonderful sex were one of Frieda's most favorite things. She opened her green eyes to see Odin content face resting the off-white pillows. She smiled. She felt complete in more ways than one. Frieda pushed herself up and stretched out the kinks in her joints hen turned to Odin again. This time, she softly brushed a fallen blonde lock away from his eyes and brought her fingers against her lips and placed a kiss. Then she brought down her kissed fingertips and settled gingerly on his lips. She's whispered "I love you." To his sleeping form before she got out, put on her underwear and dressed in his discarded shirt, the hem reaching halfway to her mid-thigh.

Opening the door, she happily embraced the silence of this Saturday morning. Sleepily walking into the kitchen, she was startled to see the boy on the table, reading the delivered newspaper. He looked up for a second before looking down to the paper again. Frieda's lips slowly spread into a smile "Good morning Izzy." She said.

Isamu barely said something audible to her.

"What?" she asked, "Um. I didn't catch that."

The boy looked up "I said hello."

"Ah." There was a heavy silence in the room. The kitchen wasn't wide, but in the silence, it seemed like a huge quiet palace. Standing in the threshold, she walked over to Isamu, overlooking the article before him. She tsk-ed and said "Oh my god" as she read the bold lettered title

"COLONIAL VIRUS OUTBREAK AT L2'S V08744 COLONY CLUSTER. MANY DEAD OR INFECTED. TREATMENT SCARCE."

"Oh god. Izzy, why are you reading something like that? It's so depressing."

"You should take the time out to learn about the world. That's what Odin always tells me."

Frieda turned her head towards him in amused disbelief. She walked over to the empty seat across from him and folded in her arms on the table. She smiled "so, how did such a cute little boy like you get to be so smart?"

He looked up across the circular table and avoided her greens eyes, the blushing color of pink licking up his face like a uncontrollable flame "um... erm... hn."

Frieda laughed, "You're an amazing kid. Like your dad. So when you grow up, are you gonna be just like him?"

He frowned "Most like."

"Oh, That's great." She said joyously.

"it... it is?"

"Yeah, I mean disposal management is a great position. Any government job is." She said matter-a-factly

The boy frowned in confusion. And then in a second, it hit him "Is that what Odin told you?"

She nodded.

He felt shock although one cannot notice it through his expressionless face. Isamu pressed his fingers on the table firmly to take his mind off the extreme lie his mentor told his...

Isamu paused. What was she to him? She couldn't have been his friend. Isamu had a feeling they were something more, but Odin wasn't the one for a long lasting relationship with females so this woman confused him. "So are you Odin's friend?"

She giggled, "I'm... his very, very special friend." And smiled cheerfully.

"Ah." He said, but didn't quite understand. He felt like there wasn't anymore to say and went back to the paper.

Frieda looked around at the table and spotted only a cup of Orange Juice. She frowned "didn't you eat?"

The boy shrugged.

"Well, that can't happen Izzy. Don't you know breakfast is the most important of the day?" Then she pushed herself up and walked over to the refrigerator "Hmmm..." she said, rummaging around the fridge "I see you have flour, milk, eggs, sugar, syrup... any blueberries?"

"Um. I think there's a can in the cupboard."

"Great!" she took all the items in her hands and arms and placed them on the counter. Then grabbing the can of blueberries and said "How about some blueberries pancakes? I usually use fresh blueberries, but I think I can make due with this."

Now typically the boy never really said much because he felt there was no desire to. However to this act of kindness, there were words to say, but for some reason he cannot put them together. He was struck mute to this. "I... I suppose... um, ok."

About a half an hour later, Odin stumbled out of the door, scratching his stomach and yawning. Walking into the kitchen, the site was rather surprising. There was his ward, eating away at a stack of blueberry pancakes smothered with warm, fragrant syrup and melting butter on top. He roved his eyes over to the grinning woman at the stove in his shirt flipping over the pancakes and singing a popular song about a love lost. "Ahem"

The two looked up alert at his presence, "Good morning Odin! Coffee?" she said.

"Please." He said as he sat down to the table, admiring Frieda dressed only in his shirt before smelling the delectable food across from him. Isamu simply looked at him with his placid cobalt blue eyes while munching away at the pancakes before him. "Enjoying that?"

Isamu nodded.

"Do you mind if I have some of that?"

He nodded again.

He growled slightly before Frieda placed a steaming cup of coffee with a plate of freshly cooked pancakes and planted a kiss on his cheeks before whispered "Don't bother Izzy while he's eating." Then she winked at the boy and went back to the stove.

Odin started cutting through the pancakes with a fork before saying "If I was a lesser man, I'd suspect you like my son a little too much than necessary." He murmured to Frieda before ending the comment with a chuckle.

Frieda rolled her eyes "Oh please, Odin." She looked over her shoulder, giving him a sly look "I can't help it if you have a very interesting young man living with you."

No sooner did she walked over to the table with her food and collectively, the three ate their food. In the silence, Isamu had an epiphany. He surveyed the scene before him. Next to him, Odin ate his food every so often, taking the chance to skim through the paper and drink his coffee. Across from him, Frieda ate her food, looking at the shopper advertisements that came with the paper. And himself, sitting in the presence of these two adults wondering how did he come to this warm little scene after all the death born from his hands. There was a word to describe the image of this scene in his head. It was going around his mind but he was too afraid to say it for fear that this scene would up and disappear like morning mist on the base of a mountain. The word made his heart swell with warm joyous feeling. A feeling like he may just be like one of the kids after all. Frieda caught his eyes and smiled. Wondering if she read his mind, she said "This is cute, it kinda like we're a family."

Odin looked up from his paper. His blue eyes went to Isamu then back to Frieda and a small smile spread on his face before saying "Yeah. Family."

* * *

June 8 AC 187

One time, when Isamu came in from school, he caught Odin drinking a bottle of vodka inside the darkness of his room. Odin once said that a human being's true essence is sensed when one is in deep concentration. The man's eyes looked as if he would no sooner burn holes through the glass bottle. Isamu stood in the doorway, staring until he cleared his voice "ahem"

Odin looked up "hey kid. How was school?"

"It's alright. What are you doing?"

"Thinking." he looked back at the bottle once again then took a deep breath as if he was finding the right words. "How do you feel about revenge?"

He shrugged "It's all the same, I assume. In the end, they get wiped out."

"Hn."

Isamu hesitated "so. Does this have to do with something in particular?"

Sipping in the air, "I have a bullet in my one of my sniper rifles. I'm saving it up for an opportune moment."

"An opportune moment of... revenge?"

Odin nodded.

This more or less through the child off, "we never killed anyone over some grudge. Is it serious?"

Setting down the bottle on the lamp table, he walked toward the bathroom on the other end of his room. Eyes to the room ahead, he said "More than you'll ever possibly know."

* * *

January 1, AC 188

The boy never celebrated the holidays once in his entire life. Odin never bothered putting up a tree or eating turkey because according to him, holidays are a time for beliefs. And if one believes in something, it becomes necessary to recognize the rewards and punishments that come with that belief. If one doesn't believe, then there's no belief. And if there is no belief, there is no need to stress about your moral fiber, or in the case of Odin and Isamu, lack thereof.

But being with Frieda, things have changed. Of course, she not a very religious person, but she has brought some aspect of morality into lives of the two. She brought the feeling of a family within Isamu every time she would come over and cook dinner before she would head off to work. Or give hugs and kisses whenever she would see him. When outside, she would hold his hand when they cross the street. He knows about crossing the road when the red light appears, but it was for that sign of concern for his safety that really affected him. Odin would never even consider holding his hand but then again, in the profession he was in, he knew Odin's concern for him was the last thing in his mind.

She loved holidays. That was something he was inwardly awed it. She loved celebrating it in all its glory. In Halloween, she convinced Isamu to go trick or treating and even got him a costume (He was a Zombie. Complete with make up, and fake blood.) Then, still in his costume she threw a Halloween costume party in her apartment and took pictures of herself in her revealing magician's costume with Zombie Isamu and Odin (he declined to wear any costume despite Frieda's complaining)

In Thanksgiving, she baked a turkey and made the entire main course of stuffing, sweet potatoes with melted marshmallows and cinnamon, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, and a great many other things that Isamu wondered just how long did she stay up to make all this. And more importantly, how did she manage to stay so energized afterwards.

In Christmas, she brought a tree to the apartment. It was the first ever in the child's life that he had one, much less decorated it. She made an event of it. There was popcorn to make the tree lining, and candy canes to place along the tree. She made hot cocoa to warm them on L1's cold nights (and it does get cold at that part of the year). She sung carols and hung up stockings around the house due to their lack of a chimney. She had presents under the tree and when Isamu woke up the next morning, he just stood in front of the tree, star struck at the boxes wrapped in colorful, shiny paper. When the two woke up, they all got together and celebrated it like a... like a family. She gave Isamu a new teddy bear to replace the old, faded one and when he held the plush toy in his small hands, his eyes started to water and he ran to Frieda, voluntarily giving her a hug.

Isamu never gives hugs. Ever.

Sitting in the living room of the New Year's Eve party in Odin apartment (thrown obviously by Frieda), Isamu noticed how affectionate he himself became when Frieda was around. Indeed, when Odin and Isamu went out on their missions, the child becomes numb and cold to get the job done. However, in her presence, he was all ready to give and receive hugs and kisses. On one point, he really felt the need to smile.

The ringing phone took him out of his reverie. Turning to Odin, he sees him and Frieda engrossed in a conversation with the downstairs neighbors and went to get the phone himself. "Hello?"

"Hello. Is Odin Lowe home?"

"Who's this?"

The voice paused. "Tell him, its someone who can help him sleep at night."

Isamu hesitated "Who are-"

"Boy, just do as you're told."

The phone was growing warm and his placed it down on the table. He walked over to Odin and told him about the call. The next thing, Odin took the phone and went inside his room, closing the door behind him. For ten minutes, he was not seen outside the room. Isamu anticipated for his return. He was having a bad feeling in his insides. There was something about that voice that made him feel like dark clouds were accumulating over the recently brighten horizon. He felt the cold rise up inside as someone came up from behind him. He shuddered as he felt a hand on his shoulder

"Izzy?"

He turned to see Frieda. Green eyes frowned in concern and her full red lips consigned to a grimace "Izzy, are you alright? What's wrong?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. Nothing's wrong."

"Oh... Where's Odin?"

"Odin. Odin's in the room taking a call."

She breathed a sigh of relief "oh. For a minute, I thought something was wrong."

On cue, Odin finally stepped out of the room. His face looked beleaguered, but excited at the same time. He looked around and saw his ward and Frieda. Odin frowned as he looked at them. His family. The news he carried in his heart can turn everything they all had to ashes in a cinder in a matter of minutes.

* * *

February 5, AC 188

Frieda stepped out of the elevator at the sight of the 4th floor sign. The sound of her heels clicked on the wooden floorboards of the hallways leading to Odin's apartment. She was startled when she saw the young Isamu sitting outside the apartment door before he turned his head to greet her silently.

"Hi Izzy." Frieda said. When she said that, she sounded... sad.

"Hi."

She breathed in the air while quickly glancing at the cold door "He's not home, isn't he?"

He shook his head.

Frieda brought her eyes down at the boy still keeping that sad expression in her eyes "Were you waiting there long?"

"I dunno. How long is long?"

"Well, right now it's" she glanced at her gold watch, "almost 4 PM. What time you get out of school?"

"2:50."

"2:50?! Izzy, you've been waiting here for more than 2 hours? Aren't you hungry?"

Her kindness never ceases to amaze him "I... yes. Yes, I am."

She stuck out her slender hand "Well, come on. Lets go to my apartment; I got some of your favorite chocolate cake in my fridge. You can have some of that with some hot cocoa, would you like that?"

Though on the outside, his expression was still the same. But inside, with the awe of her kindness and his love for chocolate, he felt such warmth within his heart "sure."

Frieda wiped her hands with the kitchen towel cloth after setting down the slice of chocolate cake to the boy. He took the fork and eagerly ate away at the dessert. He paused when hearing the silence and looked up at the woman across from him. Frieda looked preoccupied, her green eyes frown in worry. The silence was quite heavy and though he only spoke in a small voice, it seemed loud in the presence of this thick stillness "Is there something wrong?"

Frieda looked up, alarmed and then smiled and said "no. No, nothing is wrong." She murmured, "How's the cake?"

"Good. Thank you."

She smiled in gratitude. Silence blanketed the room once again. She fumbled her fingers and forced herself to ask what was in her heart. "Hey. Um... How's Odin?"

The boy looked up. He seemed a bit shocked but played it off as if it was nothing "He's fine."

"Oh. That's good." She paused "Is he getting my calls?"

The boy nodded

"Oh. Ok. I suppose he must be really busy to call me back." She said and as she said that, she frowned even further.

The boy observed that change in her demeanor. She seemed... sad. But why? She turned to look at the boy again, but this time, she brighten up a little "Ya'know, one of these days, you're just gonna wind up doing something really stupid. I mean everyone does something stupid, but it's the measure of that stupidity that really matters. It's the measure that you get judged for.

"One day, you'll meet someone. We all do. And when you do, and she looks past your stupidity. Looks at you and see everything that's good about you, then I want you to promise me something. Please."

The boy stared. No one had ever talked to him with this much intensity. His eyes asked to continue.

"I want you to do all you can to keep her in your life. Because people who can look past your big flaws are very, very hard to come by." And then she sadly smiled, "They are one in a million, kiddo. Don't forget that."

Isamu didn't quite get that. He still had the confused expression on his face and at the sight of it, She smiled a little brightly and clicked her tongue "god, would you hear me? I'm talking to you like you know what I mean." She rested her elbows on the table, fumbling and picking apart the paper napkins on the table with her eyes drawn to it, "What I do... what I do, I do not because I want to. But because I need the money. Kid, you have no idea what I go through. It's not a job many people look highly on. And in my place, you'd find that love, real love, is so hard to find." She turned her eyes away from the napkins and toward the boy, "They just can't seem to look past what I do. And those that do are so very rare. And that's what Odin is. He knows what I do and he doesn't judge. And that's what makes him so great. That's what made me love him. Because he can look past my flaws and if you do what I'm doing, that means a lot."

Isamu nodded, "I understand."

"No. No you don't."

"Ok. Maybe not, but I hope to, one day"

Frieda smiled. And this time she smiled fully "That's all I ask for."

* * *

February 8, AC 188

1:26 AM

He did it again. Odin was waking him up again late into the night. He slowly roused up conjuring memories from that night of Sam. Odin stood over him, fully dressed. "Get up. We have to go."

"Where?"

"L3. X18999 to be precise."

The boy almost choked, "L3! That's on the other side of the earth's orbit. It'll take us forever to get there."

"2 days. 2 days and a half maybe. We're taking a shuttle to L4 then transfer to a shuttle that goes to L3. Get dressed." He finished by walking out the door.

The boy crawled out of the bed to find his clothes only to find that they're gone. All his drawers and closets are completely empty. He walked out onto the living room to find suitcases placed on the floor. Odin turns away from packing his other suitcase to the boy "Your clothes on the couch. Hurry up, our flight leaves in 2 hours. We gotta go through security and I don't know how long that would be."

Dressed, the boy walks into the living room again to watch Odin finish up his packing. He hesitated for a moment before asking, "I'm aware that I cannot question your motives. However, I feel that you at least owe me a briefing on the mission we are about to embark on."

Not looking, he said, "Yes. You're right. I'll give you that. We're about to go to a colony that is still under construction. Our target is stationed there to oversee the construction, which is planned to be finished by next year."

"Stationed? You mean for military purpose or..."

"Military."

He stood still, letting the word sink in. "This isn't any ordinary mission." He said, sounding more like a question than a statement.

Odin, still packing and still not looking up, said "No. It isn't."

"Did you receive all the information that is needed for this mission?"

"Yes. That's why I was busy for the past 3 weeks. I was trying to put together a plan for this night."

"You were informed."

"Nothing gets past you, huh?"

"Who?"

"Now that's nothing you need to know about this mission. What you do need to know is what I'll be briefing you on the way to the Spaceport." He said, closing the lid, preparing to zip the luggage closed.

"What about Frieda?"

He stopped. Odin didn't look up and the boy couldn't see his face from where he was, but he flinch at the sound of her name. His eyes, blue as the spring skies, became glassy but soon changed back to its cold emotionless demeanor, "I leaving her a note. She'll understand."

"She'll understand that we just up and disappeared?"

Finally zipping up the luggage he said, "You're drawing a line and asking too many questions." Turning to face the boy he said, "She'll understand. Because that's really the only thing she can do."

* * *

February 10, AC 188

It was Saturday and 'Goldfingers' was usually filled to the brim with men willing to spend their paychecks watching naked dancing girls than paying the bills and caring for their families. In the dressing room, 'Miss. Sinn' just stepped in from her performance with two female 'students' giving the audience a lesson on punishment.

Frieda wiped the sweat from her face and chest, looking at the mirror to check her makeup. In the corner of her eye, she sees someone in the reflection coming up behind her. Looking up at the reflection, she smiled "Hey Jackie. You leaving?"

"Yeah, my shift is over. But before I go, I got a package for you."

She turned, "A package?"

Jackie nodded "mm-hmm." She handed her a large delivery envelope and glanced at her watch "Christ, 2:34 AM. My boyfriend should be here by now to pick me up. I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure." She said sounding as if she was far away. Opening the envelope, she found a letter. Reading it, she turned pale. Reading further, her eyes were getting watery and though she didn't notice, she was trembling. All the other girls turn to stare; some were expressing concern on their facial expressions. It wasn't until one of the other females asked "Frieda? Are you alright?" that she stopped, grabbed her clothes, dressed quickly and ran out to the exit. She zipped past her manager who just turned his head and yelled after her "FRIEDA! You still got an hour shift to complete, where the hell are you going?!!!"

In the dressing room, girls murmured in shock. The manager entered in the room clearly angry "Can anybody inform me what the fuck happened to Frieda?" crowding around the manager; one girl noticed the note dropped on the floor. She picked and began reading:

_Frieda, when you get this, me and Isamu will be gone. My time with you was possibly the best time of my entire 40 years of living. If you are wondering about the possibility of ever seeing me again, I highly doubt it. You were a big impact in my son's life and for that, I'll never forget you. I empty out the apartment and there's no trace of us there anymore. Go on with you life. You have many possibilities in your horizons and maybe you'll be a star. however, it'll have to be in someone else's sky_.

_Please don't go looking for me. I don't want to be found._

_Odin._

* * *

"No. No, it can't be, he wouldn't do this...." She said running up the stairs to the fourth floor. She chanted it over and over in her head, on the verge of tears, hoping somehow that this was a horrible lie or joke Odin is pulling and that they'll all be there. That when they open the door, they'll all be a family again.

Running to the apartment door, she banged her knuckles against the surface so hard, one might think she'll run right through it. "Odin!!!!... Odin!!!!" She knocked for 2 minutes before a door behind her opened up. A tired old man peered through an open crack of his door "do you mind? It's almost three AM and I'm trying to sleep." He said, sounded annoyed

"I'm sorry, I'm just trying to see if my boyfriend's home."

The man gave her a confused look "Lady, nobody's been living there for 4 days. The guy and his kid left and never came back. The landlord is looking for new tenants to take that apartment."

Slowly locking her sides into place she stared at the old man and let the words sink in to her conscious. "Oh. I see. Thank you. Good night." She said numbly.

The elderly old man, once annoyed, looked apologetic, "Um, hey listen. I'm sorry... I didn't... uh. Ya'know. Damn." He took a deep breath, "Well, listen, you go and have a good night." He trailed off on the last words before closing the door. Hearing the door clicked closed, Frieda leaned against the cool wall feeling the hardness of it against her back and slowly slid onto the floor where she just crumpled up and cried.

Because it was all she really can do.

* * *

X18999 cluster colony of L3

Arriving at the hotel, Odin placed a case on his bed. The boy, looking out of the window, or perhaps looking at his reflection stayed quiet throughout the entire trip. It mattered not. Opening the case, he thoughts relished at the following people:

The boy, who would undoubtedly, go out after this mission and survive on his own from now on.

Frieda, who shown him the good side of life and now must move on without him.

And last, but not certainly least...

General Septem. The man he was saving his last bullet from his sniper rifle for. One bullet, for the one to compensate the death of the original Heero Yuy. The one Septem hired Odin to carry out.

The one that'll give Odin peace over his grief with his blood. Even if he has to die trying.

To be continued

Next update: Due to my demanding job and college stuff the date for the next chapter will be announced. I'm starting a mailing list so when this thing is uploaded, I'll let you know. Just let me know if you want to be in this thing or not, and I'll gladly do it for ya.

Thank you very much for your patience,

Valkyrie


	6. In the arms of the machine

Past Destruction, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie skye

Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy story

Chapter 5: In the arms of the machine

November 4 AC 188

ESC1019 colony cluster of L1

7:45 PM

Even after being inside his work office for one hour the boy still felt wet through the clothes. It was raining when he arrived from L3 with old man and the rain here was heavy and pouring when they went to the office. The boy still sat across his desk, and the old man hasn't returned for a long while. He looked all around. There wasn't much to it, an oak work desk with papers scattered around it, a computer on top, humming with life. There were a few filing cabinets and a tired old green couch in the corner of the room but that was about it.

He tried not to think about him. He tried not to think about him for a long time. In his little heart, a dark void opened wider for every memory conjured up of him. Of how the sound of his voice was when he talked about anything from shooting a target to cartoons. Or the look of pain in his butcher blue eyes as he slowly stopped breathing and died before him.

The boy looked at his own hands inside the old man's office. They were small but experienced hands. They have done many things that a normal 8-year-old boy would even dare of doing. He could tell you, if you cared to know such a thing, how the feeling of a warm metal trigger feels under your index finger when compared to the cold feeling of killing someone. He could tell you how the feeling of a corpse feels like and thinking of that, the boy was brought back to that day. It something he said that prompt the boy to do it.

_It was a while ago. They past by a residential area and the owner's garden had flourishing roses so deep and red, one would think it was freshly painted with thick coat of blood. The boy looked at it and heard the monotone voice of his Guardian behind him _

"_They're interesting, aren't they?"_

"_I suppose... for flowers."_

_He walked up to one, and with grace he placed his rough index and middle fingers on the curves of the flower and thoughtfully looked at it " they're more than that. In another time, Germanic tribes thought of the roses as symbols."_

_The boy's look never changed "And?"_

"_Don't you see the importance of that?" The boy shook his head, and Odin continued with a smile, "I forget. You're still young and more liable to be ignorant. First off, symbols are important. They're very powerful. If anything, they mean power. Proof of this is that long ago, the Germanic tribes, people who fought and faced death over and over in their lives, believed that if the blood-red roses flowered over the grave markers of their fallen comrades, then their souls have transcended and went on to the next life. That's powerful stuff for flowers."_

That was then and here in this office was now. Now, when the boy was thinking about what he did that day after his passing. When he came back after the chaos was cleared and saw the corpse of what was once Odin Lowe. The bullet hole in his chest a dark and grimy color of red. His eyes were closed and he laid there as if through the chaos, he found a time to take a nap. The boy just stood and stares. He had seen dead bodies but not one that was so close to him. Thinking of the man's words, he dragged his corpse and buried it in the hopes that what he said long ago was true. He felt something in his heart that went out and suddenly he felt that the day of his own death was soon to come. It was only just a matter of time.

And indeed, time did pass. It was until a couple of months later that he found the old man in the streets of X18999. He saw him sitting on the ground looking more like a beggar when he first saw him. He asked if the boy wanted to pilot a "Gundam" to which he said sure. When he said that, the boy thought of Odin's words. "Live according to your emotions. That's that only way to live." And he did. The boy felt like piloting a Gundam, whatever that was.

A shuttle flight to L1 and hours later, the boy realized the mistake in that decision...

_Hours later after the office._

He sprawled upon the grimy floors of the hanger, trying to get up, feeling every punch the men were giving him on the commands of the old man. He felt his mouth tearing apart giving forth fresh blood on his already bitten tongue. He wasn't sure if there were three or four men as his vision was producing blurred images of the people in the hangar and his ears were ringing loudly in deafening volumes. When the final hit was given, a swift kick in the face, he fell onto the cold ground and saw the head of the half completed Gundam that, he was told, would have the honor of controlling in the future. The old man is talking as he stared at the emerald eyes of the machine and took its image into his own bloody blue eyes before consigning to his own oblivion.

Living his life on his emotion gotten him into this position.

Piloting Wing would be the only decision he will ever make based on his emotions.

The boy swore it.

_Hours prior to this, in the old man's office..._

The boy turned towards the sound of the opening door. Coming out was the old man. He held a walking stick with his mechanical arm that, according to the old man, was fashioned by himself. His slanted eyes were held behind a pair of spectacles that seemed embedded in his face. His lips were dried as he fashion it into a smile and beamed at the young seated boy. "Why hello again. I'm sorry for the long wait. I was briefing my team about you. We'll meet them all in due time. Meanwhile, why don't you do me a little favor?"

The boy nodded "What?"

He walked towards a filing cabinet and took out a blank sheet of paper and placed it in front of the boy with a pencil "What I want you to do is to draw me a little picture. The theme is what do you want to be in life? It could be anything, superhero, fireman, anything. I'll be back in a hour or so to see if you finished, is that alright?"

"Yes. That's fine."

He nodded and left the boy alone again.

An hour later, the old man came back again, the click of his walking stick clearly heard from the outside. The boy looked up it his presence by the doorway "well, how's the picture going? Are you finished?"

The boy nodded.

"Splendid. Lets see." The boy handed the sheet to the old man to which he looked and nodded thoughtfully.

In the pencil image, he drew a crude image of himself lying backside down with a pool of what looks like blood. "Hmm... interesting image. Suicidal, aren't we?"

The boy shrugged "Life is cheap."

"And yours?"

His voice grew into a whisper, "Especially mine"

The old man's lips grew into a smile "You know? I think you'd make one hell of a pilot." He stuck out his metallic hand towards him "come. Allow me to give you a tour of the site."

The boy slipped his small hand into the mechanical arm to which it wrapped tightly on his hand quicker than his eyes could catch it. He couldn't help but to flinch, as the cold metal was pressed hard against his flesh. He looked up at the old man who was grinning, "I'm sorry. Sometimes this old thing could grip tighter than an Anaconda. Shall we?"

* * *

"Its Gundanium. It's indestructible and making a weapon that is indestructible certainly gives us the leverage, don't you think?"

The boy didn't really answer him. He just kept his eyes on the unfinished machine before his eyes. It was like a dismembered body strung up in chains and cords. At one part of the hanger was the arm; in the other was the cockpit. In this part was the head; a work in process. He sees one part of the face complete while the other was still being put together. He felt a strong grip on his shoulder and turn to look up at the old man. He was rather silent for a while before saying "You know something? I never asked you for your name. All this talking about my little project and I never got your name. Well then, you can call me Dr. J. And for future reference, what is yours?"

The boy looked at him "I have no name."

"No name? No family, no home and no name." He chuckled, "Now I definitely feel like you're were made to pilot this thing. Well then. Allow me to give you a name."

To Dr. J and everyone working with him, the boy was known as Pilot 01.

They both then walked to crates where they sat and talked about the capabilities this "Wing" will have. It seemed to fill the boy with an unidentifiable sense of giddiness hearing the amount of arms this machine will bear; two Vulcan guns, two Machine cannons, a beam sword, and a Buster rifle from which Pilot 01 understood that it could take out multiple Mobile suits in just one shot. This sense of new power being bestowed upon him was, in a way, terrifying but enthralling at the same time answering to his darkest dreams of being "on edge" against the world. This would probably make others (whoever they would be) to think twice before fucking with him, the 8-year-old figured.

After some tea and a bit to eat, they both stood up. Dr. J and Pilot 01 walked towards the part of the hangar where the head of Wing was being constructed. He looked up thoughtfully at the machine and then back to the young pilot. He then motioned a couple of men towards them and began to speak, "Now that you understand what goes on here and what I'm asking of you, do you still wish to follow through. This is the last time I ask you this because once we agree, you can never go back on your word. Do you want to pilot a Gundam?"

The boy stood silent taking his words in before answering, "I said 'sure' didn't I?"

Dr. J grinned "Good boy. Gentlemen, you may begin."

Now he didn't know exactly who did it first, but he was aware that someone from the group gave him a rapid uppercut to his jaw. The force of it made him fell back to the cold hard floor with a loud thud. He struggled to get up which he succeeded in doing until another punched him in the gut. He felt himself being pushed around receiving physical punishment from each man. All the while, Dr. J looked on and spoke through the young pilot's abuse "You see my boy, what we are trying to do it simple..."

A punch to his sides...

"I cannot have just anyone piloting this thing..."

A punch to the side of the face...

"No, I need someone who can kill without regret..."

A punch to the right eye...

"Who can do what I order to do without question..."

A kick to the ribs...

"What I intend on making is another machine. A perfect solider..."

And finally after receiving that kick in the face, Pilot 01 went down. Dr. J walked over to him, that telltale sound of his walking stick signified his presence closer to the boy "I swear to you my boy. I intend to empty you of the unnecessary emotions and fill you with hate and war and death. I will squeeze that heart of yours and fill it in with myself. You'll have no need to love or feel desire because that only thing you'll ever need is your own death. You can take my word for it."

In the silence, Dr. J felt the Pilot's pulse. Still beating, but faintly he went to the group of men, "Call the medical group and take him to sick bay. I want them to monitor his healing process. When he's healed and fed and washed, start this process all over again."

And with that, Dr. J walked off leaving the battered, bloody body of Pilot 01 to the group.

It was through the acts of love that created the boy. And it will be through the acts of hate that'll create 01.

To be continued

AN: holy crap, thank you for your responses! And your patience. For that, I'm thinking of tossing in a couple of 1xR lemons (of course, not here.) in the very near future. And yes, Relena's role is coming soon.

Thank you, thank you, thank you so much!

-valkyrie skye


	7. Growing pains part 1

AN: warning, graphic child abuse of the physical and verbal nature happens here. If you're disturbed or otherwise offended, my apologies. You have been warned. Also, I won't take credit for the torture scenes. That one goes to '1984' by George Orwell. I thought the torture scene was a perfect example of someone giving up their humanity and so I wrote down a watered down version here.

Oh and BTW, it says 'part 1' because this chapter is going on to 13 pages already, and that way too long, or at least that what I think. But don't worry; I'll try to get the other part up before thanksgiving.

Thanks

-Valkyrie

Past Destruction, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El soldado eternal: Heero Yuy story

Chapter 6: Growing Pains, part 1

May 14, AC 189

ESC1019 colony cluster of L1

8:35 PM

Pilot 01 walked out from sick-bay and into the cold gray hallways of the hangar. There was no destination in mind for him, just a need to walk away. He knew they were behind him, somehow, in a way, ready to jump him, to do it again. It was his third time in the sick bay. Empty blue eyes ahead, he walked like he was the dead. The first time was in the middle of the main hanger's floor, fists falling on him like hard rain. He dreamt of this in the hospital bed as he healed his broken bones the first time. When he healed, they fed him the most delicious food, bathed him, and clothed him. He felt like the light was just ahead of him. That entire day went along fine, until he went to bed.

_They showed him his room, a cold sterile area with a small bed across from him. He looked to the man who showed him the room, a tall fellow in a gray shirt and dirty blue jeans. He was one of the men who had participated in his beating. The man just looked down and his small, thin lips turned upward in a smirk. "Night" he said before turning out and shutting the door behind him leaving Pilot 01 in the darkness. He turned ahead of him slowly, hands outward until he bumped into the solid hardness that is the bed. He turned back the stiff white sheets and crawled in, looking up at the darkness until his eyes fell asleep…_

_Footsteps…_

_Many… all coming in._

_In his sleep, he heard footsteps fall against the hard ground within his subconscious. It was then that he felt cold iron clamp down on his small ankles and within a measure of a heartbeat, he woke and felt himself being harshly pulled out of the bed and onto the floor. In the midst of his grogginess, he sees light pouring in from the open door. The light cast some shape to the figures in the room. He looked at the figures in a startled alarm until his gaze fell upon the man who brought him here._

_He was still sporting the same smirk._

_In the natural Japanese tongue, one of the men spoke "Get up, shithead."_

_"Wha… what?" his voice was so small in the intimidating presence of the men, "what?"_

_One of them chuckled "Look, it's the big pilot." He said in a mocking voice, "Our fucking savior."_

_"Yeah. On the floor, like a little animal."_

_"Hey, what the hell are you talking about? He is an animal, aren't you, you little fucker?" questioned the other men._

_Pilot 01 crawled on his hands and knees, trying hard to see through his sleep-gummed eyes. The man who brought him here, shoved him down to the floor by his shoulders with his foot and kept him pinned there "Come on, shithead, Hiedo-san asked you a question. Are you an animal?"_

_The pilot struggled underneath his boot. His small little body writhed and wiggled and then he heard his own voice let forth a guttural yelp. The man pressed harder on his shoulders. The pilot managed to open his eyes a little and could see his dark hair falling over his slanted eyes "well, half breed? Answer the goddamn question."_

_Pilot 01 didn't know what to say. At this point, he figured that if you were wise enough, you would appease your attackers and manage to stay conscious and not face any more punishment. Under the pain and stress, his voice shrunk but was still audible "y-yes…"_

_"Yes, what?" when the pilot wasn't responding, he pressing harder "What? Say it. Say the whole goddamn thing."_

_"I'm an animal."_

_"Louder, asshole."_

_"I'm an animal." He said a little loudly_

_"No! louder! I want the fucking alliance back at Earth to hear you!"_

_"I'M AN ANIMAL!!!"_

_"Now, get the fuck up." The man lifted off his foot from Pilot 01 shoulder allowing him to get up. He struggled to get up on weak knees and although he wasn't aware, he was trembling._

_The men snickered and the man known as Hiedo spoke up "Look, he's shaking." Then his hand shot out and slapped the 8 year old in the head "stop shaking, dickhead. Face your punishment like a man."_

_And he did try, he really did, to stop the shaking but doing so only caused him to shake even more. He faced the man whom he met earlier and received a harsh punch in the face. The pilot fell to the floor and the nightmare was beginning again._

_"Come on fuck face, cry! Cry for your mommy!" one said as he felt his fist on his chest. The darkness, combined with blinding fear and pain caused all the images, all the voices to become so indistinct from the pilot's perspective, that he couldn't tell which fist was which. Which slur was which._

_"Smash it! Smash his goddamn half-breed face in!"_

_"Take it like a man!"_

_Soon enough, Pilot 01 didn't felt the pain anymore. Didn't hear the slurs. All he could feel now, is the sweet familiar oblivion that comforted him during his first healing from the first beating._

_Oblivion, at this point, never seemed more appealing to the Pilot before as it did now._

The most recent beating occurred when he was walking out in the hallway a month and half ago. They just came out and cornered him and beated him once again. And now here he is walking, knowing they're there. Knowing, somehow, they'll just re-appear here, or in his room, or the bathroom, or somewhere anywhere, and do it again. There was a voice in his head that he was not aware of, speaking like a recording, only off beat. He focused his attention towards the voice, trying to hear its words.

"They'll beat me, and I don't care, they'll beat me and kill me and I don't care. I don't care, I don't care!, I DON'T CARE! I'M AN ANIMAL, AN ANIMAL, A GODDAMN ANIMAL!"

"Pilot 01."

He turned quickly, his eyes, like wild blue orbs taking in everything all at once. It was Dr. J. He stood a couple of feet away from the young pilot, his mechanical arm holding the walking stick firmly upon the ground. The old man studied the pilot from his distance and after awhile, said, "come here."

Never hesitating, the pilot walked over to the old man and stood no more that two feet away from him. Pilot 01 eyed the Doctor with his dead blue eyes. Dr. J, for his part, reached to touch his face and looked closely into his eyes. "I like how they're looking so far. But I feel like there's one more thing that has to go through." Placing his hand to his side again, he asked, "Do you understand why this punishment has to occur?"

Pilot 01 shook his head "No."

Dr. J smirked "No. I didn't think so."

Footsteps. His inside froze with fear. He turn to face a tall thin man, whom he remembered as Dr. J's assistant armed with a needle and the next thing he knew, His eyes were being pulled down in sleep and then, Darkness.

* * *

There was a droll pain in his head when he finally woke. Tightness around his wrist and ankles made him tremble in an uncontrollable fear. Had he ever been this scared before? He can't remember. Pilot 01 felt himself lying against a hard bed in a dimly lighted room. His wild blue eyes rolled rapidly all around trying to take in everything. Over by his side was a machine and by it was Dr. J's assistant. The machine had wires coming out of it and was attached to parts of his head and parts of his body. And next to him, seated on a chair, watching the pilot was Dr. J himself armed with two guards on each side. Dr. J smirked when the Pilot's eyes fell on him and then he stood up.

"Welcome back, boy. Good to have you with us. We can't very well do this without you, now can we?" he stopped as if the pilot was going to answer. When he didn't, he went on. "Well then, first off, how are you feeling?"

Pilot 01 didn't answer.

Dr. J just stared, then turned to his assistant and nodded his head. Pilot 01's body felt, instantly, the flow of burning pain throughout his body in sharp currents. He yelled out in a loud guttural cry until the currents died down. He had 20 CC's of electricity flow right through him. He looked at Dr. J with wide eyes and as if answering his glance, Dr. J said, "For every question not answered, you'll get a shock of electricity flowed through you. Mind you, boy, that 20 is the lowest in this machine. It can go higher." Dr. J walked closer to the Pilot and leaned in. Pilot 01 can smell the tea in his breath, "I know myself that you are not stupid, far from it. So lets not pretend that you are dense and answer my goddamn questions, hm?"

Pilot 01 nodded.

Dr. J smiled "Now that's acceptable. Shall we begin?" he walked back to his place with an air of a Teacher speaking to his student, he began "Now, then. How are you feeling?"

"I. I feel…"

"You can be honest with me boy. If you feel like shit, you can say so."

Pilot 01 searched for the words, "I… I feel like… I feel fine."

"Fine?"

"I suppose. I suppose I feel… fine. Miserable. I feel like shit." The words came forth like a dribble of water.

"Now that's more like it. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I get off seeing you in pain, its just I detest liars. If there's nothing that I hate more, it's a liar. And you're not a liar, are you?"

"No."

"Good." He paced the length of the room considering what to ask next. Pilot 01 saw that the old man was getting frail and slow; his back was growing a hump causing his posture to become poorer. He turned to look at the pilot strapped to the bed like a wild beast and continued, "Do you have any idea as to what you are doing here, with me, with my little project?"

"To pilot Wing, to- AGHHH" He yelled out in close to a shriek.

"No." Dr. J said, "No, that was not it at all. Haven't you been paying attention to anything I said back when we first met? It was more than the Gundam. I wanted a perfect solider. The machine, in truth does not matter cause the machine breaks." And then in voice like reverence, he continued, "It's the person inside. It's in here" and he jabbed a finger on his temple as if to prove his point "that matters. When they piled on you, my boys, when they piled on you and beated the life out of you, did you know you went down in no more than 10 seconds?"

Pilot 01 shook his head.

"Of course not. In a time like that, you aren't really thinking about it aren't you?" he smiled as he said that. "But it's important that I notice something like that. Imagine, if you will, that you were in Wing right now. Picture yourself in the middle of the battlefield surrounded by the enemy. You're being shot left and right by mobile suits and sure, its Gundanium, but what if the Alliance has something similar or better? Believe me as I say this. Never, I repeat, never underestimate the Alliance." He waited until Pilot 01 was about to speak. And sure enough, his lips moved to speak.

"Permission to speak?" Pilot 01 asked. Dr. J nodded, "You use to work for them. Didn't you?"

Dr. J didn't respond. Instead he went on as if the Pilot never asked anything "The point is that in a situation like this, endurance is the key to your survival and the survival of this mission. Endurance is a mental thing, boy. If you can't survive 10 seconds of a beating, what makes you think you can survive in a battlefield?"

"I… I don't know."

"Right. You don't. You know that all this, this treatment. The training. It's for your own good, you know that?"

The pilot nodded.

"Tell me something. Would you believe anything I say?"

"Yes."

"Really? What is the color of my hair?"

"White."

"And if I said Black, what is it then?"

The pilot hesitated. He didn't know what to say, "White. UGHHH" blinding shock went through him. The meter went up to 35.

"You're not following through. What color is it?"

"White. AGGHHHH!!" tears seep through his eyes and down his temples.

"If I say it's black, what color is it?"

"BLACK!" he screamed again. The meter went up to 45.

"No. That's not enough, you're saying that because you figured that it will stop the pain, yes?"

The pilot nodded.

Dr. J considered his words. He carefully examined the body on the bed. "Over two hundred years ago, Russia was a communist country. Did you know that? It was once called The Union of Soviet Socialist Republics or the USSR. But you wouldn't know that. No one in this day in age would. It's a forgotten piece of history than managed to get itself forgotten in the human subconscious. In those times, they were the leaders in torture and fear. They would take prisoners both innocent and guilty and torture them for a crime that did or did not existed. Their 'confessions' were why the government stayed in power. The lies made their torture legitimate; 'For the good of Russian Republic'. It was that sense of nationalism that kept the communist in power for close to a century. But in time they failed, and did you know why?"

He shook his head.

"They fail to make their prisoners believe their crimes. They failed to make their people believe in them. The Russians knew, each and every backward farmer, peasant, comrade knew that the only way to stay alive, the only way to survive and not get taken away by the secret police was to pretend to swallow the propaganda bullshit Lenin and then Stalin was spewing. The communist government had them and at the same time, they didn't. They had them because on the outside, everyone was a good comrade, true in word and deed. But at the same time, they didn't because they weren't a good comrade in here." And once again he pointed at his temple. "As I said before, it's in here that matters. Do you understand?"

Pilot 01 managed to gather spit in a swollen mouth and painfully swallowed, "You. You want to get inside my head." He said in a low, tired voice.

The doctor looked at the young boy on the bed and smiled "I want you to believe in me, no matter what. That's what a perfect solider does. Never questioning, always believing. When I said to you that I intend to empty you of the unnecessary emotions and fill you with hate and war and death, I meant it. Ignorance can take you a long way. Now, lets try again. If I say my hair color is Black, do you really see Black? Honestly. I will not shock you for your honest answer."

He paused "I see White. I can't help it. I can't stop believing what my eyes see."

"Alright then, very good. Which then would you prefer, to really see Black? Or to convince you to see Black?"

"To really see Black."

And then the world dissolved before his eyes. In a growing burning ball of pain, electricity flowed through him again. Growing along with the meter, the boy strain in his registrants. 45 then 55 then 65 and beyond. His brain started to go through overdrive. He thought, for some reason, of Odin and his graceful presence. He thought of Frieda and of her kindness. Her cooking was always so good and the chocolate cake was always a taste that lingered. He could have sworn the taste of chocolate was on his tongue, so savory, so sweet. However, as the electricity mounted, his senses were out of whack. The taste on his tongue was not Chocolate, but his own blood.

In his eyes, the colors seemed to swirl and the number of people in the room blurred and wavered. He looked at Dr. J and the colors just seem to eddy and spin. It was and it wasn't white. It was blue and black and purple and orange. When the electricity was turned off, his head and body was beyond numb. He heard a voice and was then aware that it was Dr. J

"Pilot 01."

He eyed him

"Pilot 01, can you answer me? What is my hair color?"

He tried to speak clearly but managed to form his words in a gargle of words "Black. Blue. Purple, I don't know. I really don't know but if you keep on doing that, you'll kill me… You'll kill me… Stop."

Dr. J smiled "Very good." He then lifted a needle and injected him with a flourishing wave or relief. All the pain was soothed away, all forgiving and all comforting. He breathed normally and Dr. J checked for his heart rate. He then asked for his guards to unstrap him from the bed and place him on a stretcher. He knew he was being transported somewhere, but it didn't matter. The pain stopped. That's really all the mattered. Soothed by the painkiller flowing in his blood, he fell asleep hoping somehow, the sleep would just last forever.

Thinking about that, he fell asleep with a small smile on his lips.

* * *

It possibly could have been days, weeks, or months since he been in this little 8 by 10 cell. There was one light coming in from the square shaft above the ceiling. The shaft was no bigger than his own hand. He woke up one day in here and since then, he didn't know what to do when it came to hunger cause there was no food given to him save for water and no place to urinate and extricate his waste except to release himself in the cell. The stench was overwhelming in a short amount of time. Sitting now in his own squalor, his thoughts led him to Wing. Dismembered when he first saw it, it was still as memorable and ominous as the darkness of space. Powerful. Very much the opposite of Pilot 01 now, helpless. When Dr. J said that he would pilot Wing, he believed him at that time and now Pilot 01 is considering the possibility that he is the brunt of the old man's perverted joke. Possibly laughing at him in the hanger as he sits here waiting to die. The men and the doctor; eating, laughing like mad.

Pilot 01 felt like laughing like mad because at this point, he knew that he probably was.

He was still in his hospital gown the day he came out of sick bay for the third time. How long ago was that? Being in this cell made him forgetful of time. Time, being here, really didn't mattered. Nothing mattered.

'In here mattered' he would say. Endurance was in the mind. Was he right about that? Was he right about everything? Did Dr. J have his mind? He shivered at the thought. "No" he said to himself, "No, he can't, he can't have my mind. Odin said to live by my emotions. If Dr. J wants to eradicate that away from me, what, then, will I have left?" He shifted his seating position and thought on this further "How can he stamp out my emotions away from me? Is that possible? Emotions are in the mind. It's not like something you can amputate like a leg or a hand." But then, he thought back to the bed, and the electric shock treatment. When Dr. J shocked him to the point of death and asked about his hair color for the umpteenth time, he really did see all sorts of colors on his hair and the room. Dr. J, at that time, had his mind. Pilot 01 shivered again. "He… He can't. He couldn't. Can he?"

At that point, the cell door opened. Before him was two stalwart guards and the small familiar silhouette of Dr. J. With the opening of the door, light from the outside poured in and for Pilot 01, of which he himself hadn't seen any vast amount of light for an indeterminate amount of time, he blocked his eyes. "Long time no see, Pilot 01."

"Just how long?" He asked in a voice barely above a strong whisper.

"Close to two months. I'm sorry if I was disturbing you, you seem to be in the middle of a conversation."

Pilot 01 grew surprised "How did you know that?"

"You were talking to yourself out loud, didn't you know that?"

The pilot stayed silent in the waste strewn cell. Dr. J, breathing through his mouth finally huffed and turned to his guards, "Enough, I can't stand being here. This boy's piss and shit is getting to me. Take him to room 209."

"Why? What's in room 209? Haven't you proven your point? I'll believe in you, I'll take orders from you, what more do you want from me?" pilot 01 croaked.

Dr. J turned to look at the mess that is pilot 01 at his feet with an expressionless face. No one could tell what hid behind those spectacles of his but for Pilot 01's worth, he could probably give a guess that its anything but sympathy. Thin lips fashioned into a smirk for only an instant and said, "No. You're not ready to do that yet. And you'll see why in Room 209." Then he walked off with the guards in tow carrying the pilot out onto the outside.

* * *

The room was nothing like the others. It was very much like a normal room with a chair on one side and a table on another. On the further opposite to where he is standing, was a full-length mirror. After the guards closed the door, Pilot 01 looked at Dr. J standing before him who gave off nothing to show what will occur in this room. Pilot 01 didn't know if that's something to give horror to. The hunched old man eyed the child with such stillness and composure like a master craftsman beginning his masterpiece. When everyone was now in their place, Dr. J finally began, "Let me first say that Dr Freud, as insane and wrong in some theories as he is, never believed in the slip of the tongue. When one says something 'accidentally' in their sleep or otherwise, its believed that whatever is said, they meant it." He walked over to the chair and slowly sat down and continued again, "I knew that in the electro shock treatment, you were willing believe, but you didn't quite made it through. Putting you in that cell proved my point.

"When a person is in solitude for a long period of time, things start to slip. Confessions, ridiculous babbling, prayers, etc." He slipped his hand into the coat pocket and pulled out a small hand held recorder, "Things of this nature applies to what I previously said" He pressed the play button and as the words filtered into Pilot 01's ears, the child felt his bowels dropped inside. In and all around, he felt a cold chill and froze in movement. The recording captured every clear word he said:

" 'No, he can't, he can't have my mind. Odin said to live by my emotions. If Dr. J wants to eradicate that away from me, what, then, will I have left?' "

" 'How can he stamp out my emotions away from me?'"

" 'He… He can't. He couldn't. Can he?' "

He stopped the recording and filled the short silence by saying "Yes, I can."

The pilot shook, what was next? Why can't the old man just let him die?! Dr. J stood up again and walked closer to the trembling boy "I will show you the extent of emotions. I will show you just how powerless and faulty they really are. Remove your clothes."

Pilots 01 widen his eyes. What perversity did the doctor have in mind? Pilot 01 heard the slow heavy footsteps of the guards and rather to endure another horrible beating, he quickly divested of his hospital gown. He reached behind to untie the string that held the filthy gown in place and let it fall in a heap around his feet. He wore no underwear or any other clothing beneath the gown. Before the eyes of the doctor and the guards, Pilot 01 was naked. Dr. J stepped aside and gestured an arm towards the mirror "Go. Go to the mirror. See what emotions have done for you. See yourself for what you are."

Numbly, he slowly walked over to the mirror as if approaching a dangerous animal. He breath caught at his throat as he saw a skeletal figure coming towards him in the mirror. It was pale. It was dirty. It was sickly.

It was him.

His blue eyes were glassy and yellow around the whites as he stared at his emaciated figure. Ribs popped out of his side that were so visible, a person could count each one from far off. His joints were like balls and his legs and arms were like fragile little twigs. His brown hair was limp and hanged from his head and his skin was pale beyond imagination. He felt warm tears coming forth from his eyes the longer he stared at himself. Finally, the child broke into choking tears and fell to his knees not noticing the clicking of the walking stick coming closer to him. When Pilot 01 opened his eyes, he saw through the blur of his tears Dr. J's shoes. He then looked up with an agonizing look across his face to the old man standing before him. The pilot then quickly seized the doctor with his bony hands and managed to clutched on to the doctor's crisp white lab coat screaming in agony "YOU!!!! You did this to me!!!"

Dr. J wrapped his arms around the boy and said very calmly "No. You did this to yourself."

"HOW?!" he sobbed against his coat

"Simply by denying me, you cause yourself to be in this state. Don't you see that by holding on to your emotions, you are only fighting against what I'm trying to give you?"

"What?"

"Endurance. Did I not tell you that endurance is in the mind?"

"Yes."

"And did you not figure out that I was trying to get into your mind?"

"Yes."

"Well don't be stupid boy, put two and two together. I am endurance. I could be your endurance. Let me in, and I promise, you'll never be in this helpless state again. Believe in me and anything I say, and I promise that your ignorance will take you to such great heights." He took Pilot 01 out of his arms and looked directly at his eyes, "Wing is only a representation of what you could be. Take that extra step and let me in."

The pilot shivering in his arms stayed silent to his request. The doctor tired of his hesitance and dropped him on the floor "Get up." He said harshly. Pilot 01 obeyed and slowly pushed himself up from the cold ground. The doctor paced back and forth eyeing the boy the whole time with eyes of distain "Look at you. In the course of two months, you lost 30 pounds of body fat. You once weighted in at 78 pounds and now you're 48 pounds. You're severely underweight, you've been tortured repeatedly, and do you know you smell like shit? Well you do. And all this happened needlessly because you refuse to give in."

"I can't help it!" he yelled out in anguish, "I can't help what my mind does. I wish I could believe you, I wish I could ignore what my eyes are telling me, I wish I could just stop feeling my emotions, but I can't!"

At that, Dr. J laughed "Emotions? My boy, what do you know about emotions? You have no family, no name, no past. What could you possibly know of emotions? Tell me one person in your life that has ever taught you emotions."

He didn't meet much people in his life. At least those he actually knew. The people he saw or talked to were clients of Odin who wanted someone wiped out or the victim themselves. The only person he knew well was Odin, a man of very little emotion. As he felt the draining power of defeat, a memory of someone flashed through his mind. A memory of love, warmth, and heartfelt caring. Pilot 01 turned to Dr. J and said "Frieda."

"Frieda? And who, may I ask, is Frieda?"

He gathered up his courage to speak which came out in the form a whisper "She was my guardian's girlfriend. A man named Odin raised me and he had a girlfriend for two years. She loved me and cared for me. She cooked and hugged me and kissed me when I felt… down."

Dr. J nodded "Alright. So Odin was your Guardian but not your biological parent?"

"Yes."

"And he had a girlfriend named Frieda?"

"Yes."

"Mm-hm. So tell me, what did they do?"

Pilot 01 paused. He really didn't know how to say this, but he felt that if he didn't answer soon, there would be a unpleasant consequence coming shortly "Odin was a hitman and Frieda took her clothes off for money."

The doctor paused before chuckling "A killer and his stripper girlfriend, how romantic. So tell me, if she loved you so much, why are you here?"

"She… She doesn't know where I am. Odin and I were in L3 when he passed away. After that, I met you."

Dr. J nodded again "Allow me to tell you something about women. Women are good for one thing and that is to get them on their backs. Women are fuck-worthy and nothing more. Is a killer capable of love? He left her cause he got bored; such is the case with many men. In the end, she probably got hurt. The cost of living by your emotions. Women are faulty cause they are far too susceptible to emotions and are more likely to get hurt. This Frieda, if she were in the battlefield, she would be most likely to die first. Pain, heartbreak, emotions can only hurt you in the end. Love is, by far, the worst human trait."

The child stayed silent. His eyes were red from all the sobbing and he body felt the ravage of fatigue and defeat. Pilot 01's heart leap to his throat when he felt the harsh grip of the doctor's hand around his arm "Do you see the price of emotions for you? I'm 67 years old. I can't lift anything more than 4 pounds and I walk at the pace of a snail and yet, I'm strong enough to break your arm in half!" He removed his hands and paced furiously again "I bet I could tear out your teeth with my fingers alone as well as your hair. Your legs are as thick as carrots and your head; I could smash it in with my shoe. Pathetic. You are a pathetic piece of shit. All this, and you know it yourself that it does not have to be this way."

Pilot 01 nodded "No. It doesn't."

Dr. J turned to the boy. He had his head down and his arms limp to the sides. After sometime, he raised his head and had the wrenching look of someone who lost someone or something close. He raised his arms and had them outstretched to him "Help me. Help me stop the pain. Help me become the Perfect Soldier."

The doctor came around and wrapped his arm around the boy's bony shoulders. He walked towards the door in silence and when he reached the threshold between the guards, the doctor said, "That's a start. Is there anything you would like to say before we move on?"

Pilot 01 thought of this before asking "What day is it today?"

"July 17, AC 189."

"Oh. My birthday passed. I'm 9 years old now."

"Oh really? Well then, Happy belated birthday."

And then Pilot 01 felt the pierce of something sharp in his arm and felt darkness clouding his eyes. That wonderful feeling of sleep rushed through him and felt his body going limp. After that, it was darkness again and nothing else.


	8. Growing pains part 2

Past Destruction, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El soldado eternal: Heero Yuy story

Chapter 6: Growing Pains, part 2

August 29 AC189

ESC1019 colony cluster of L1

It was long, but he now weighted in at 80 pounds. He stayed at sick bay since that day Dr. J opened his eyes and from there he was fed 4 times a day and was bathed constantly. He had access to a bathroom next to his bed and was dressed in a clean gown everyday. When the medical assistant took his third meal he was left with a pad and a pencil to pass the time. Pilot 01 took the pencil and poised it above the paper thinking thoughtfully what to write. The thoughts were in his head and as much as he didn't want to write it, he felt himself giving in to the defeating thoughts because it was so much easier than to fight them.

The first he wrote down was 'Endurance was in the mind.' And when he wrote that, he felt the memory of Odin and Frieda fading from his mind.

He urged himself to continue with the second thought 'Emotions are faulty'. He then felt tears roll down his eyes but disregard them as folly and ignored the hot, salty tears.

The last he wrote were 'Women are fuck-worthy' and at that, he felt he had let go of something in his heart and mind. Something that kept him in balanced all his life and was gone in an instant. At that same time, he felt like he also lost that weakling that was in that cell and in that bed receiving electric punishment.

Thinking about that, was it punishment? It made him see the truth of emotions and the power of ignorance. It made him see that ignorance could make him invincible and knowing that strength is a valuable quality, then it could not be punishment. It'll make him into an effective solider. He will achieve all his goals.

Everything that happened, Pilot 01 realized now for what it was. It was not a punishment. It was a privilege.

Later, when Pilot 01 was sleeping, Dr. J's assistant took the pad and brought it to Dr. J. Looking upon what the child wrote, he smiled.

The old man won. Dr. J had finally gotten into Pilot 01's head.

The next day after breakfast, Dr. J and his assistant was in the medical room with Pilot 01. After doing the necessary checkups, Dr. J smiled at the boy "You're doing nicely. How are you feeling?"

"Better."

"Splendid. Then we'll begin then." He turned and Pilot 01 froze.

"Begin what?" the pilot asked, he mind going into an overdrive of fear and questioning.

Dr. J chuckled "Nothing too serious, I assure you." He said, holding a vial and sticking a long needle within the protected top withdrawing a clear fluid from the inside, "Remember what I said about endurance and about you not lasting for more than 10 seconds against the beatings from my boys?"

"Yes."

He stayed silent for a brief moment before taking the needle out of the vial, its chamber full of the clear liquid, before he said "Well, while endurance is indeed, in the mind, it is also a physical aspect. As I said before, you healed in the normal rate of a human being, 6-8 weeks. This thing here will help you get back on your feet a little more quicker; your shoulder, please."

Pilot 01 leaned forward and gave the old man his shoulder. He felt the cold wetness of the alcohol pad rubbed on his shoulder and shortly after, he felt the long, thing metal pierced into his soft flesh. The pilot held back his sign of pain and only grunted, hoping to not show any weakness. It reached in deep and let forth the fluid into his blood stream. When it was pulled out, he sat back and looked at the doctor, who was properly disposing the needle in a biohazard trash box. The doctor looked up at the young man's eyes "Yes?"

"You didn't tell me what exactly it suppose to do. I don't understand what you said earlier. What do you mean by getting on my feet quicker?"

Dr. J nodded "Well, what I just administered was a serum. The STI-119 is an enhancer I created, which speeds up the process of healing by accelerating the response time of the white blood cells. Faster cells means faster clotting which mean faster healing. It also helps speeds the process of repairing your bones by more than half."

"119? What happened to the rest of the 118?"

"Trial and error with 118 test subjects. But I had nothing wrong with this one, so you needn't worry about this. However, I do need to see how this works so you need to meet with my boys again."

Pilot 01's stomach dropped "again?"

"Yes. But this time, you'll know when its coming."

True to his word, Dr. J sent the pilot to a room where he waited a few minutes until the group of men came in. They surrounded him and began the process of beating him once again. When all was over and the pilot woke once again from unconsciousness, he gazed at the familiar white ceiling of sick bay. He waited a short while before bringing himself up coming face to face with Dr. J sitting next to his bed. The doctor grinned, "Welcome back. Do you know what day is it today?"

Pilot 01 shook his head

The Doctor pointed to the calendar far across the room. Pilot 01 squinted to see until the vision became clear to him. It was September 5. Pilot 01's eyes widen and turned to the doctor. "You had 12 broken bones, severe lacerations, and a punctured lung. All this, and you healed in the matter of one week." He said; his lips fashioned into a grin, "How do you feel?"

Pilot 01 looked at his hands in disbelief, healed and whole. He flexed his fingers and felt the muscles working smoothly. In a quiet voice, he said, "I feel… I feel. Fine."

"Fine?"

The boy nodded, "fine"

And he did feel fine, In fact, he never felt better. Injections of the serum happen bi-monthly until his body happened to make it more permanent. First it was two weeks per month then one week, and then every so often until he was 12 when he stopped receiving injections. In between those times, he had various sorts of training. There were further desensitized training in the forms of snuff films and actual executions. Being with Odin, that didn't quite move him. At the age of 10, there was a period of months when Dr. J set him out in an undisclosed area of L1 where he had to scour his own food and survive on his own without the assistance of anyone but himself. That mission was as followed; find your way back to the hangar without being noticed from Dr. J's covert agents on your own from an unknown location. He survived through the cold and the hunger and the sleepless nights on the streets until he found his way back to the hangar, undetected and alive.

At the age of 13, he walked into another part of the hangar where some of the men congregate to fist fight for the sake of passing time. The smell of sweat, beer, and blood hung heavily in the air. He watched as the two men; one a technician and the other, Dr. J's personal hired gun, the very same man that initiated the beatings when Pilot 01 was younger, savagely punching each other while the crowd cheered for every brutal swing. The technician, a youngish 20 something, act on the mistake of pulling back for a mere 7 seconds, quickly analyzing the next course of action. It was enough time for the other man to repeatedly punch the technician along the head and chest. The blows finally took its toll and the technician fell to the ground in a loud thump.

They all cheered, loud, throaty exclamations of joy rising through the room. Many exchanged money from angered people; other shared laughing delight over the spectacle. Some people came out from the crowd and dragged the unconscious body away. The winner felt the cold glare coming from the crowd and turned to see the bitter, Prussian eyes of Pilot 01 upon him. He smirked and it's something Pilot 01 can never forget. The crowd eventually died down and turns to stare at the young man who stood ever silent against the deafening silence. The winner expanded his smirk to a grin "well, look who just stepped in. It's our savior. My, hasn't he grown?" and to this, they all laughed. But Pilot 01 stood against them, his glare, not wavering. "It seems you getting to be a big, strong man. Well, then…" Then stepped aside to the left and extended a hand towards he space he previously occupied, "Come over here and show us how much of a big man you are."

Pilot 01 closed his eyes as a sign that he accepted his offer and walked towards the empty space. The crowd murmured and the air was soon filled with a savage excitement. Pilot 01 looked at the floor, stained with blood and sweat. He hears the cheers and the chants of the spectators and the betting that is occurring all around him. Suddenly, he was pulled back into that day when the man across from him pinned him to the ground with his boot all those years ago, asking if he was an animal. Pilot 01' eyes were all a glowed with a subtle ferocity as he kept his glare at him, answering him mentally 'Yes, I am.'

The two, now battle ready, faced each other. The noises all around them were drown out in their ears. The man raised his fist, ready to strike. Pilot 01 simply stood there, still keeping his gaze on the man. 'Easy target' the man thought as he swiftly made the first hit right into Pilot 01's face with the expectation of the young man falling back. Instead, what he got was Pilot 01 turning his head with the blow then turning back to face the now shocked man and punched him in the jaw in response. The man's head flung back with the harsh blow and stumbled a few paces back, trying to regain his position. There were gasps of disbelief in the crowd. The man raised his hand to his jaw as he turned his attention back to the pilot, eyes adorned with disbelief and anger. "You…" he huffed surprisingly and then he laughed, "…you fucking cock sucker. That hurt."

The man charged at him then, a large mass of muscle and testosterone running towards him like a bull that's seeing red. Pilot 01 stood still again, seeing directly into the eyes of the large man coming closer. He waited for the moment, the opportune moment, and when he was close enough, Pilot 01 dropped to the floor sweeping his left leg under the man's feet. The man tripped and fell hard, face first onto the concrete breaking his nose in the process. Blood came forth, a red splatter as it hit the ground. Pilot 01 stood fast and picked his leg up, slamming it down on the man's head in a punishing blow. The pitying "ooh" echoed throughout the hanger as they saw Pilot 01 knocking a grown man in unconsciousness. But to 01, unconsciousness wasn't satisfactory. Seeing the man bleed and placed in a fetal position wasn't enough so kept on throwing down hard punches and kicks to areas sensitive to any sort of abuse. Anger filled his mind with images of the man and his group of thugs surrounding his 8-year-old self, giving forth an incredible amount of pain and taking pleasure in his cries and tears. Anger, hurt, pain, it was fuel to keep throwing down harsh, lighting punches and kicks on the man. It mattered not that the man was already not moving and it mattered not that the man was bleeding and broken all over. It was not so soon that Pilot 01 was punching and kicking a corpse.

"Enough." A voice said. Everyone turned and Pilot 01 finally stopped to look. Dr. J calmly surveyed the crowd and his spectacled eyes fell on Pilot 01 above the corpse formally the doctor's employee. He showed no emotion when he sees the corpse. There was an unsettling silence from everywhere, but especially between Dr. J and Pilot 01. An eternity afterward, Dr. J finally spoke again "Pilot 01, why did you feel like killing Keiichi-san?"

Pilot 01 didn't know how to answer that. He felt no remorse but rather the fires of hate and anger cooling down leaving behind a dull feeling of exhaustion and numbness. He kept his gaze at Dr. J and said, rather dully "I felt like seeing blood." Then slowly, he walked away past the stunned crowd past the stoic Dr. J and out of the place. Dr. J didn't look back nor did he went after him but rather walked over to the bloodied corpse of Keiichi. He felt for the pulse but found nothing except for the cooling dead meat beneath his fingers. He stood up and turns to face everyone in a composed fashion, "Well nothing to see here, gentlemen. You two," he pointed to two men "take him and dump him somewhere. Before he starts sinking up the place." And then he walked off in the same path as Pilot 01, casually, as if nothing ever happened.

Apr 06 A.C. 195

As the years go by, the missions became more complex, missions that involved certain members of The Alliance. Political leaders for example, have come more into focus. To be more precise, one vice foreign Minister Richard Patrick Dorlian. Pilot 01 being driven to the L1 Intercolonial spaceport thinking deeply of the briefing done before he left.

Hours prior

"Boy, come here. I must brief you for the upcoming mission." And the young man did as he was told and walked over to Dr. J. Pilot 01 looked at the doctor as he always did but this time, he looked like he was anticipating what Dr. J was going to say. "01, this may turn out to be your final mission."

Pilot 01's ears perked up, final?

"The Barton Conglomerate is planning to assassinate the Vice Foreign Minister Dorian for finding out about Operation M."

"And?" Pilot 01 said, emotionlessly.

"You have three choices. One, you can cooperate with the Barton Conglomerate and assassinate the Vice Foreign Minister Dorian. Another, you can stop the Barton Conglomerate and protect the Vice Foreign Minister. And the final one, you can choose to ignore this mission. Choose any of the above. It's up to you..."

It was not always like this, Dr. J giving him a choice. It was a first of sorts. He was accustomed to receiving missions as they come, whether he liked it or not. Pilot 01 supposed it was because after 6 years of scrupulous service, he had earned enough trust from the young assassin. Even after the incident with the little girl and her dog.

Pilot 01 paused at that and bit his tongue hard to the point of bleeding to forget the memory. Physical pain was so much more better to feel than the recollection of that day. That day, Pilot 01 likes to remember as the day he fucked up.

So. Those were the choices. The death of the vice foreign minister would mean that even after that fuck up, all errs would be forgotten, all mistakes mended. The Barton conglomerate would forgive him after that error. But then it'll send the entire world into a tailspin. Vice foreign minister Dorlian was all that stood between the desires of the colonies and the United Earth Sphere Alliance. So that left out ignoring the mission and doing the dirty work for them.

There was only one option left…

Present time

Pilot 01 made his way to the roof of the west wing of the spaceport. According to the schematics, it was the best vantage point for this mission. He thought carefully of the consequence of his choice. Was it really wise to take this route? Step after step, the cold gray door coming closer to his vision; Pilot 01 knew one thing is true. He knew there was really no going back.

Opening the heavy door, the fresh crisp air kissed his face and the artificial afternoon sun lit his eyes and warmed his skin. Ahead of him he sees a man holding his sniper rifle, his barrel settled on the ledge, the man's head leaning forward in the eyepiece. Pilot 01 observed the man silently. The man hunched over and stayed very still like a fatal statue. One foot after the other, he walked over in a catlike grace to the hunched man. Close enough he slowly raised his hands to the direction of the unsuspecting assassin. In the speed of a blink, Pilot 01 clasped his hands over the man's head and swiftly twisted the head around until his heard the crack of his spine. Holding the corpse of the assassin close to him, Pilot 01 felt the man's warmth leaving him. Pilot 01 gently laid the man upon the cold roof and stood above him, surveying his work. It was not more than a several seconds when the man was alive and breathing, getting ready to take away another life. Pilot 01 felt no pity for the body before him. He just felt numb and cold. It was fitting however. The man was going to take a life that would affect the earth and colonies. The death of the assassin will affect nothing.

But is that entirely true? Odin's death meant worlds to him. He distinctly remembered feeling a large void being open apart in his small heart long ago, back when he was mentally weak. Will there be a prodigy out there deprived of his mentor now that this man is gone? If there is, will that prodigy thirst for his blood as Pilot 01 thirst for Odin's murder? Should there ever be one, Pilot 01 will be waiting.

'With your emotions… Huh.' He thought. Did this man believe in that dogma? Being here with the intentions on carrying out the Barton conglomerate's wishes, he probably did. The sea surge of voices below him slowly grabbed his attention. Out of curiosity he looked over his shoulder and turned to walk over to the ledge. He looked over the crowds of reporters; there in the middle was the Vice Foreign Minister. Pilot 01 went to the dead man's bag and took out his binoculars. Back at the ledge, he took a closer look at the man. The young man saved his life. Will he ever know? Would he ever be grateful? Pilot 01 knew he'd never will, so gratitude from the part of the Vice Foreign Minister will come mentally. That much he knew for sure.

Someone was beside the Politician, so he turned his attention to the Vice Foreign Minister's side. It was a young woman whose eyes were as sad and lonesome as his. They were colored like the blue of a placid lake. Her hair was long and dark blonde however; the light of the artificial sun tinted her hair like golden honey. The young woman's face was soft yet devoid of any form of emotion. Her soft, pale pink lips formed a small line. He wasn't too sure she cared much for the attention that surrounded her. Pilot 01 never really noticed it, but his eyes wandered to her body. She was as young as he, so he knew her body wasn't as womanly as elder women are. However, she wasn't a child as evidence of the swells on her chest. The subtle juts of her hips pressed against her rose pink skirt gracefully and her legs were long and smooth.

He was aware of the opposite sex. In fact, last year on his birthday, Dr. J and many of the staffers set him up a night with a prostitute. It filled Pilot 01 with a sense of illness when her heard the voice of the woman whispered in his ear that night 'I'm here to make you into a Man.' and she did things to him he had only dreamed of in his sleep. He was familiar with wet dreams since he was 13 and he saw Dr. J's belief in Women more clearly since then. The only desire Pilot 01 had for women were on their backs. Pilot 01 put down the binoculars now and looked at the girl below.

She survey everyone and by chance, or cruel fate, she raised her head and look at the young man off the distance. Pilot 01 was filled with a wild sense of fear he was caught! He covered his face immediately and walked back. They were too far from each other; she couldn't see his face clearly. He was hoping on that as he left the premises.

He waited for his ride to come by and pick him up and as he did, his thoughts remained on the girl with the sad eyes and the warm, soft body.

He convinced the driver to let him go at Temura District. Pilot 01 watched as the car went off and he walked off into the streets. There wasn't much in this neighborhood, but once upon a time there was something. This place used to be known as a residential area for Alliance workers in the near-by base. There were many apartment complexes and small businesses in the area now all gone and empty save for stragglers and people trying to earn a living selling useless trinkets and junk. Pilot 01 stopped in front of a junk dealer selling old useless, worthless memories on a dirty blanket. Broken paperweights and tarnish Alliance metals taken obviously from the corpses that died here. Amongst the items on the blanket were tired looking flowers. He brought a flower from the junk seller and continued to walk on with his thoughts. The last time he was here, it was early last year. As part of a sabotage mission, he was assigned to destroy the base. However, he miscalculated the proximity of the complexes and the explosion wipe out the buildings near by. He was surrounded by destruction and death and his mind was filled with terror. It was not what he planned and in his panic he ran over in hopes to save at least one life. In the rubble, he saw the lifeless, broken corpse of a little girl and her puppy. He stared at her small bloody face, lily white and cold with death.

She couldn't have been more than 6 when she died.

He remembered carrying the puppy in his arms. Inside, his heart and mind broke. When he returned to the hanger, he was whimpering incomprehensible phrases and mumblings. The technicians gawked at him; they had never seen 01 like this. His eyes were wide and vacant as he wandered aimlessly within the hanger. When Dr. J arrived, he looked at 01 with a displeasing shock "What the hell happened? What's that filthy thing you're carrying?"

Then 01 stood silent and looked at the doctor before he dropped to his knees and yelled out a crying sound from his throat. Dr. J let an annoyed expression chew into his aging features before motioning his entourage to take the young pilot away from him and into a cell until Dr. J decides what to do with him. A day after that, Dr. J sat down and had a talk with pilot 01 who sat in the corner of his cell, his knees pressed to his chest looking vacant and withdrawn. Dr. J tried to find his eyes hidden under the pilot's wild, unkempt hair. "Pilot 01" he said but no response. "Pilot 01." He said again, a little more loudly. The vacant, steely stare of the pilot turned slowly as if his neck was held together by rusty metal that was fragile. "Pilot 01," he said again in a calm composure, "I talked to Dekim Barton. You remember Dekim, do you not? He's the gentleman in charge of planning operation meteor." Pilot 01 nodded curtly and the doctor continued "I told him was happened yesterday and he's quite angry. This isn't the time to fall apart, understand?" Pilot 01 nodded, "The freedom of the colonies and the succession of Operation meteor lies within you, but this display yesterday was appalling and disgraceful. You know what I must do, right?" Pilot 01 said and did nothing "Dekim suggested to start over again. Start re-training you again like we did in the good old days."

Pilot 01 knew what he meant by that, more beatings, more desensitization, and more pain. Pilot 01 nodded in acceptance and he understood that his suffering would be the best for everyone else. That's how life was for him and that's how it will always be.

And now he's here again, to pay off debts long over due. Above him, the colony sky started to snow and over yonder, there was someone in the distance. He walked over to the rubble and slowly, reverently and placed his flower on two marked stones. Beneath these stones lie the bodies of the girl and her puppy. Pilot 01 stood over these stones and knew that there was only one way to repay his debts to this girl.

He reached behind the small of his back and took out his gun. He unlatched the safety and pressed the barrel against his temple.

Time to end this mission

"Mission Accomplished." He whispered.

"…Mission." Said a voice behind him.

Startled, Pilot 01 lowers the gun and turned around to face the voice. Dr. J stood apart from him for a short while in silence before he walked forward and spoke up "I've decided to go through with Operation Meteor."

Pilot 01 stayed silent

"You have three choices. One, pilot the Gundam and go commit mass murder. Two, shoot me here, and flee somewhere... and one more is..."

"Is?" asked Pilot 01

Dr. J looked composed with thought. He had always taught Pilot 01 that there are always alternatives to any path you choose. Nothing is truly set in stone; no matter how long one plans for it to be. "... You should know what it is." He simply said.

Pilot 01 huffed "Ok."

Back at the hanger, Pilot 01 was walking to his quarters for tonight's sleep. He was to wake up in the early morning hours and be ready to start the mission. He walked past the main hanger where the Wing rested, complete and battle ready. He stared at the gleaming war machine in all its horrifying glory. It was in bird mode, the metal shining red, blue, and white. He once remembered when it was incomplete and defenseless, much like he was at that time. Right now is a completely different story. He could kill without much of a fight. When it came to killing someone, he was powerful and immaculate. Efficiency, he learned, was key as well as endurance. Without it he cannot complete his missions, he cannot fight.

But he's been killing and fighting for so long. How long can he keep this up? There was one desire he had for so long, but he was never able to initiate it. He wanted to end the need to scream, to curse in the top of his lungs, to throw objects around the room for the hell of it, to kill anything living. He wanted to end his life.

There were no weapons with him at this moment. Every time he was to enter the hanger he was to give in all weapons to a staff member. It was a standard rule; he was to have no weapons of any type on his person unless it was for a mission. Fulfilling his need to die wasn't easy, they always had their eyes on him, yet however he did have one trick up his sleeve. Pilot 01 turned to the storage cabinet on the far right where his space suit, oxygen tank, and various other accessories were stored. He managed to smirk at this. Dr. J had no idea, at least to him, what he had in mind. The staff didn't see the harm in letting Pilot 01 access to his suit. What they didn't know was that Pilot 01 had managed to rig a self-destruct device on his suit. It was in frequency with Wing's self-destruct mechanism, which was originally planned for the pilot to destroy the suit away from the machine without any harm to the pilot so that they may live to fight another day. But to live another day in his life was more of a battle everyday, one of which he could not bear. He wanted death and he wanted to do that as far away from Dr. J as he possibly can.

For the first time to Pilot 01, tomorrow was a brighter day than ever.

He continued to his quarters. He passed by a room where some of the staffers were sitting around engaging in various activities. A TV was on in the room and Pilot 01 heard the reporter loud and clear "Today's visit from The Vice Foreign Minister was an eventful day, to say the least. He'll be here for just one day to discuss Alliance policies on civil order in the colonies. Accompanied with him today is his daughter, Relena Dorlian" the shot was turned to the girl with the sad eyes. Amidst the sea of reporters, she carried composure and a sense of calm one would think she was able to walk on chaotic waters. It was only a brief shot of her, but the image was mentally burned in his mind. He walked off carrying her image in his mind.

"Close to the scene of The Vice Foreign Minister's arrival, spaceport security found a dead body on top of the west wing of the spaceport. The identity of the man or the motive of his death is still unknown…"

Pilot 01 distinctly remembered going to sleep. He was in his room when he closed his eyes and when he opened them, he found himself in the forest.

It wasn't an area he was familiar with, fresh trees and crisp grass beneath his feet, the air as brusque and sharp as the plant life around him. Over the distance, he saw Relena walking around the forest, looking at the trees with calm reverence. He stayed his distance, content with the fact that she doesn't notice him watching her. A look of fear immediately took over her features. She turned to see a figure behind her. It was some sort of wolf beast not more than 15 feet away from her. There was a growl that hung from the air and saliva dripping from its jaws. It stood on its hind legs like a man and it moonshine blue eyes laid harshly on Relena. She shuddered harshly and ran off like a frighten deer, but the wolf went off after her.

She pumped her legs as fast as she can. All around her, trees whipped past, the air bit into her delicate skin. Relena looked back and the wolf was not too far away from her. Running was all the girl can do to be as far away from the beast behind her. He's gaining speed and she runs faster in response. Ahead of her, there was a house and suddenly she found her destination. Relena arrived at the doorsteps and open the front door, immediately running for the staircase after locking the door behind her. By the time she was at the top of the stairs, the wolf beast burst the door open. His head turn towards the figure on the top of the stairs. She was there and then she disappeared into the halls of the top of the stairs. She turn to a door that was halfway opened and locked it behind her. It was a bedroom and she hid under the bed, hoping the wolf wouldn't find her. Harsh beatings upon the door resonated and finally, the door caved in. The wolf beast stood in the doorway, searching the room. He walked in slowly, sniffing the air and then stood still. In a quick speed, he reached down under the bed and pulled the girl out by her hair. She let out a high pitch scream as he did so and groaned as he tossed her on the bed. Once again, she was pulled out of her despair and let out another scream when the beast ripped open her blouse and tore off the clothes from her body. She lay there naked as the beast crawl on top of her. His eyes feasted upon her clean, young body with much satisfaction. His eyes caught the refection in the mirror above the bedpost. The Beast was not there anymore but rather Pilot 01. It was his hand holding Relena's frail wrists down. It was his naked body hovering above hers. It was him all this time.

He looked to the body beneath him. She was in tears and her eyes were away from him. Relena couldn't bear to look at him. Her glorious figure was frozen in fear beneath him. She tried to stay still, but it seem that the more still she tried to stay, the more her body would shake and shudder. Does he really have the audacity to rape the figure beneath him? He sniffs the air lightly and smells the scent of lavender from her skin. He slowly lean down and continue to waft the scent from her skin and as he did so, she whimpered. He was so used to the scent of gunpowder and death that something so insignificant as a scent can be so intoxicating on someone. His face close to her skin, he felt the creamy texture against his skin. She was… she was so…

"You feel so good…" he murmured without thought.

"And you…" Relena said, her voice so small, so weak, "you need to wake up."

And at that Pilot 01's eyes flew open. He was soaked in sweat, fear and lust. He felt a familiar hardness between in legs and turned to find his member fully erected. Pilot 01 stared up at the ceiling, wide eyed and shaking. It was so much and felt so real. Her body, her voice, it was torture.

He wanted her. He wanted her so very badly. And he never really knew her, but that was beside the point. Pilot 01 got up and took out a small bottle of lotion. Advice from one of the staff taught him to relieve this situation through manual means. It always filled him with extreme pleasure followed by an immense sense of shame. But he couldn't very well carry around this embarrassment in front of the crew. Pulling down his shorts, he poured the lotion into his hand and swallowed the congregating saliva on his tongue. He must end this quick, the mission won't wait for anyone.

"Operation Meteor... at last." Dr. J breathed out. In the wee hours of the morning, crewmen and technicians were everywhere, checking stats and weapon functionality. They checked on Wing's many program systems and software seeing that everything was up to par. The doctor heard footfalls behind him and turned to see Pilot 01 dressed in his spacesuit. The doctor merely smiled and cocked his head towards the cockpit as if telling him to get on board.

Pilot 01 needed no more instructions other than that and climbed on board. He checked all systems and as he did so, Dr. J came up to the side of the opened cockpit "Because Vice Foreign Minister Dorian's assassination was foiled, the military head quarters now knows the operation plans and it'll probably be better if they decipher it."

"But the mission in reality will be different." Pilot 01 stated.

"That's right... This is the mission you chose. However you risk your life with this launch."

Pilot 01 sighed. Words like those were like water, it didn't effect him "Don't worry... Life is cheap... Especially mine..." he said in a dead tone.

"Contact may come at any time regarding targets" Dr. J continued, ignoring what Pilot 01 said.

"Roger..."

"Engage in the missions as quickly as possible."

"Roger..."

"Let's decide on a codename. I've decided on the name of the pacifist space leader. You got that, Heero Yuy?"

"Roger that..."

And so the fire from the engine roared. Wing, in bird form flew off into air and off into space with the intention to let loose a wave of pestilence and death on the blue sphere of earth.

Something was waiting for him there he knew that for sure. He figures it's his death but as he felt comfortable in that knowledge, he forgot the one important lesson Dr. J had taught him.

Nothing, not even your death, is truly set in stone.

To the mission, the world, and forevermore, the boy is now known as Heero Yuy.

_To be continue…._


	9. chance meetings part 1

Past Destruction, Future Rebirth

By Valkyrie Skye

Act 1: El Soldado Eternal: Heero Yuy story

Chapter 7: part 1: Chance meetings

April 31, AC 195

Okinawa, Japan, Earth

Heero Yuy lies on his bed in the boys' dormitory of The Saint Gabriel institute pondering over the events that occurred in the past two and a half weeks. Lying on the bed was his only respite since he first touched ground that Tuesday, April 7, AC 195.

Two Weeks Prior

April 7, AC 195

Hours after the launch off, the young Pilot Heero Yuy heads towards the Earth. Through the chaos of war and strife, Heero feels the weightlessness of space through Wing's metallic armor and thus finding serenity. In his mind came a quote from Ronald Reagan, an American president paraphrasing a sonnet from John Gillespie Magee, a young American airman killed in World War II back in the pre-colonial days. He heard it once from Dr. J months ago when they talked about space over break between sessions. He remembered Dr. J's voice grow solemn when the words passed through his aged lips.

_"We will never forget them nor the last time we saw them this morning as they prepared for their journey and waved goodbye and slipped the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God."_

Of course, when Reagan said that, he was referring to the people that died in the explosion of a space shuttle. But looking at this in a different light, Heero can see the connection with his arrival to Earth. Slipping from the cold, harsh mechanical bonds that are the colonies and touching something so pure, so natural as the Earth. Had he been in a different life, he could appreciate the beauty of Earth and defend it with all his heart. But that's not him, not now. He's born to touch the beautiful blue Earth and crush it with the hand of Wing.

"Right on schedule. Seven minutes to re-entry."

Heero turned to his side and his senses are turned to high alert. It's a shuttle and quickly, Heero thought up the quickest mode of attack. However, He stopped when his radar picked up another shuttle behind it, a federation ship. Possibly guard detail assuming the first shuttle to be a threat. Whatever it was, it was best to still go undetected and so Heero kept continuing his travel towards Earth.

By the time he hit the surface of Earth's atmosphere, he sheds the protective armor and reveals his shuttle form. Amidst the whir, beeps, the loud clanks of hot metal, and the deafening noise of penetrating through the atmosphere, Heero hears the shrill alarm of his radar going off. He turns his attention to the monitor. It's the shuttle trailing the first shuttle. Upon closer attention, the radar reveals it to be a Federation Freight Carrier. Where there's a freight carrier, there are OZ soldiers and it seems apparent that Heero has caught their attention, which in his case is extremely unfortunate.

Heero saw the carrier releasing two mobile suits. Ever ready for a battle, Heero fired off the first missile shots and in retaliation the mobile suit shot back. However, it didn't damage the surface of Wing and Heero. It was not so long until Heero's first battle began. They exchange fire, an amazing and frightening display of light and fire. The first mobile suit blew up in a ball of flames. When Heero saw that, he thought it was funny. In fact, it was so funny that he couldn't help but laugh at the madness. He, too, is mad and his madness makes him laugh. "One more to go!" he yelled out and then the other was promptly destroyed.

Out from the carrier came a Leo Mobile suit. It grabbed Wing and the two machines descended towards the earth, falling faster with every foot. He knows he must focus on landing at the arranged location but if this mobile suit doesn't let up soon, his trajectory might be off and he might land in some unknown location. He is to land in Japan and at this rate; he could crash into the Asian lands or end up in the vast Pacific Ocean.

The loud crashes of the mobile suit against Wing's frame grow harsher and louder with every pound it receives. Inside the cockpit, the temperature grows uncomfortably hot. Heero's body is burning with heat from within and all around. His eyes begin to blur as the sweat rolls down his face. All the buttons and levers seem to meld together, each appearing to be the same. Through the monitor, he sees the vast blue ocean of the Pacific hundreds feet below him. A smile formed on his lips, he just might die from this.

This is the end. It was all that he ever asked for.

He was aware of hearing crashing sounds. Heero assume it was the battle he was going through. But he wasn't moving and everything was so dark. He felt wet and warm throughout his body. He breathed in the air and it carried a salty mist. He put all the seemingly separate information together in his mind. He must be near the sea, which means he hadn't died much to his disappointment.

His mind screamed at him to wake up but to no avail. The helmet he wore was soon removed and the scent of the sea was much more apparent than ever, the scent of the sea and of something else. He could have sworn he smelled a delicate, more softer fragrance much to the scent of flowers. A soft voice filtered into his ears and into his mind

"He's just a boy," the voice said. It was soft like her fragrance and if he heard correctly, she sounded concerned. The crash of the waves became more clearer with the helmet gone and the sun kissed his skin with warmth. The breeze hits his face and as nice as it felt, it just made him more apparent that he's without the helmet and the person can see his face. The voice in his head became more louder demanding him to…

His eyes flew open. He was lying down, defenseless. Heero stood up quickly and looked around, the blue sea, the golden sand beneath him and…

Her. She was on her knees, startled. Her blue eyes widened with shock and with his helmet on her lap, he can only guess it was her that removed it. Knowing that she saw his face, she knows now. She'll know everything and he has failed.

"Don't move. An ambulance is coming." She said.

Heero couldn't breathe "did you see it!"

"What?" she asked, a sense of concern and in her voice.

"Hey, in here!" a voice yelled out. He turned to see the medical personnel stepping out of the vehicle. His heart dropped at the site of this. There was only one option left. He moved to hand down to his chest to active the self-destruction device and push the button. In less than a blink, Heero felt himself being hoisted up on the air and landed several feet from where he was standing, still alive and with a burning sensation on his chest.

'No!' he thought 'how can this be! Everything was wired correctly!' he tried to think of a thousand possibilities on what went wrong when his mind was drawn away from his though. They were all coming out of the vehicle. There was no way out, no weapon, no way of killing himself. There was only one thing to do.

"Hurry, this way! You-" but the emergency worker was cut off when he was cut off by Heero as he ran and single-handedly took down the personnel and drove off with the ambulance in no more than half a minute.

He parked the ambulance in a small stretch of an alley far away from the beach. It reeked of feces and urine and garbage, but with the coming evening, it was dark and solitary and perfect place to assess his next course of action. He sat in the back of the ambulance looking over his spacesuit. After looking at the burnt wires, he saw the wiring was not as it was arranged to be. He growled and threw the spacesuit on the other side of the ambulance. Sabotage. It had to have been Dr. J.

"Bastard" he muttered under his breath. He looked beneath his shirt and saw the nasty scar from the malfunctioned self-destruct device. He rooted around the truck for antibiotics and bandages for his wounds. Finding everything he needed, he tended to his wounds efficiently. While preparing the bandage, Heero noticed a laptop in one of the many shelves of the ambulance. He smirked at that. With this, he could hack into any system and make contact with Head Quarters for further instructions.

"Hey, what the hell is this?" a voice said. Heero froze. Did they track him down? Did they have a transmitter in this truck? How could they find him?

"It looks like an ambulance truck" another voice said, "Cool. Do you think it's abandoned?"

"I dunno. Let's look inside."

Heero stood up. He braced himself as he heard the handles of the back door turn. The outside light flooded inside the dark backseat as the doors opened up. He saw the young men flinch at the sight of him inside the truck. "Holy shit." Said one of the young men.

Heero slowly stepped out of the vehicle and carefully examine the young men surrounding him. There were four of them and they didn't appear to be members of OZ judging by their broken jeans, tattoos, and piercings. "Awe, its just some fucking kid. Hey, kid did you lose your mommy?" one of the thugs laughed. Everyone else follow after.

"Hey, get lost, we're taking this truck" said another thug, but Heero paid no mind to him. Instead, he paid mind to the pistol the thugs were carrying. He needed weapons…

"Kid, You deaf? Fuck off."

Heero still stood silent. His acute hearing took note of one of the thugs from behind him taking out the gun from his waistband. Heero dropped to the ground and swoop his leg passed the thug's leg causing him to trip. The fallen thug lost hold of his gun as he fell to the floor. Heero grabbed the gun as it fell from mid-air and pointed it at he three left standing. The three remaining thugs stood shock, however it did not stop the thug from the left to attack Heero. The thug from the left lunged at him with a switchblade. Heero stuffed the gun into the waistband of his shorts and then grabbed the attacking thug's right wrist and gave a crushing squeeze so that the thug could loose his grip of the weapon. And then, to prove a point, Heero grabbed hold of the left arm and pinned it to the thug's back leaving the right arm outstretched to the side. Heero glared at the two thugs in front of him and broke the outstretched arm with his knee. The thug let out a guttural scream as the bone from his right arm broke in two leaving him horribly deformed. The two remaining thugs turned pale at the sight and ran the way they came, whimpering in fear. The other two lied on the floor, one unconscious, the other crying in unbelievable pain. Heero took out the gun from his waistband and picked up the blade from the floor. As he did this, he noticed and pamphlet that lied on the dirty, murky ground. He picked up the pamphlet and examined the subject:

'St. Gabriel Institute, A place where your child of today can become the world leaders of tomorrow.'

He observed the pamphlet carefully as a plan formulated in his head. It was close to the navel base he was set out to destroy and it was a secluded place to hide out. Heero made his way back to the ambulance and opened the laptop. His first system to hack into is the Saint Gabriel Institute admissions website page.

April 8, AC 195

Saint Gabriel Institute

Okinawa, Japan

"I must say Mr. Yuy, your grades are outstanding. You scored a rare yet perfect 500 on our placement test. I could only remember one person who scored that well on the test."

Heero nodded at the woman sitting at the desk across from him, "Thank you. I appreciate your commentary on my transcripts. I'm sorry my parents cannot be here today but they're very busy at their jobs in Tokyo."

"I understand. As long as they filled out all the necessary forms and the tuition for the semester is paid out, seeing them will not be required. You'd be surprised how many kids we have here have busy parents. Many have companies to tend to and even jobs of political importance." The woman rose, "Come, you're first day awaits you, Mr. Yuy."

Heero, complete in the standard uniform of dark blue, followed the suited woman to the door. As they walked the corridor of the Admissions office, she begins to speak, "Since your outstanding score in our placement exam, you have earned the schedule we here at SGI call 'the honors schedule' it mostly consist of college level classes such as Intro to Psychology, and Modern World History.'

Leaving the office building, they walked past the courtyard in which cherry blossoms bloom with pink petals decorating the smooth concrete ground with it's candy pinkness. In the center of the extravagant courtyard stood a fountain of the archangel Gabriel looking peacefully at those below him. An androgynous beauty with an expression of love and humility sculpted on his face. "Our school," the lady continued in a voice that sounded like she had rehearsed this speech time and time again, "boast a small student body so individual attention is available to those who need it. Our students participates in many social activities such as food drives, fundraising for the needy and the like." They reached another part of the campus as they entered a roman-esqe building with looming archways that bears familiarity with the catholic churches of France. "However, while we realize education takes first priority over anything, our students do enjoy and indeed deserve some downtime. Many students enjoy taking part of such activities such as fencing, horse back riding, swim team, chess club and even the audio visual club." She continued walking down a corridor and stooped in front of a polished oak door "Here we are Mr. Yuy, your first class of the day. It's something you should be familiar with, Advance Calculus."

The woman pushed open the door and strode in with Heero in tow. Inside was a large class that was fashioned to look like an auditorium with a dais from which the professor was instructing the class. The women spoke briefly and then the woman from the office turned to Heero and placed her hand on his shoulder. Heero just eyed her warily "Welcome to Saint Gabriel's, Mr. Yuy."

Once the woman left, Heero turned his attention to the professor who simply smiled "Hello Mr. Yuy. I heard much about you. What do you think of the school so far?"

"It's an excellent school and I know I'll enjoy my stay here." He replied.

"Wonderful. Well then, lets get your day started. Why don't you introduce yourself to the class?"

Heero turned around and looked out the class "Heero Yuy. Nice to meet you."

"Mr. Yuy, seating is first come first serve and since you came in the middle of the class, I'll have to find a seat for you. You can sit next to… Oh! You can sit next to Miss Relena Dorlain. I'm sure the two of you have a lot in common."

Heero looked at the person he'll be sitting next to and although he face hadn't changed, his inner sense of self went into shock. It was her! Again. She saw his face, he was sure of it and now she holds the very power to destroy him. His resolve strengthens. It will be either her or him and he'll be damned if it will be him. He won't let some weak woman bring him down. Heero turned to the woman "In what way do we have in common?" he asked, almost accusingly.

Surprise chewed into the professor's aging features "Oh, I figured Ms. Iwa told you already. She's the other person that scored a perfect 500 on the placement exam. If you have any questions, she will be glad to help you. Now let's start the class." Then she smiled "I'm sure that you two will become the closest of classmates."

Heero turned away from her muttering "yes…" then under his breath; he said, "Close."

He walked up the step to his desk, not keeping eye contact with her. He kept his stare at the tiled staircase in a fashion like that of man who's trying to ignore an outside force. He sat into the seat and immediately her scent; her persistent scent invaded his nose. That familiar scent of flowers had seemed to be ingrained into his brain. "It's nice to meet you, Heero." But Heero face kept still, his deep blue eyes closed behind his lids. The voice of the teacher resumed but in his mind, he kept aware of her stare and strangely he had the urge to turn and answer her gaze. Mentally, he fought that urge and kept his attention at the lesson at hand.

Still. Having her ocean blue eyes trained at him felt… felt… Well, it felt…

Nice.

It was recess and his wandering took him to the balcony of Sage Hall. He leaned against the rails formulating the next course of operations. He's aware that on this island of Okinawa, there's an Oz naval base that was once a naval base for the United States Marines. This was before the time of Oz when the world would consider the concept of Space colonies the thing of science fiction. The federation saw the advantage the Americans had in securing it and brought the aging base from the U.S. government for several millions of U.S. dollars back in A.C. 126.

But before he could do anything, he must wait for instructions from headquarters. Until then, he'll continue his role as a student in this school. Keeping that in mind, he turned his head behind his shoulder to view at the students below him. They all passed each other, some in groups conversing over food. He was aware many of them are the offspring of important people. They were wealthy from birth and to him; each one of them emanates a sense of ignorance about anything that doesn't involve their gilded world.

"Excuse me." A voice said. He turned to the source of the sound. It was her. Relena. She stood in front of him from a reasonable distance. Behind her, a small crowd of her adoring friends stood there watching the two face each other. Her scent invaded his senses once again and she stood eloquently, as expected of her kind, with a thing that resembled a letter in her hands. Relena smiled kindly at him and that was a strange sight for Heero. He cannot remember the last time someone smiled kindly at him. Or maybe he does, but doesn't want to open up old, faded memories. The girl tilted her head to the side and extended the letter. "Here you go, I'm having a birthday party tomorrow. I hope you can come and join us." Then the crowd behind them applauded gently and murmured signs of approval.

He looked at the invite in his hand, a sight so strange to him as the surroundings of this school. He didn't know how to feel about this. The voices in his mind yelled him, telling him about this girl 'She saw me. She knows who I am. I cannot fail my mission now. I won't let her!' and so he took the invite in both his hands and tore it in two before her eyes. He looked up and saw her pretty face crumble. Her cerulean eyes were edged with forming tears and she turned her head away, not able to look at him. "But… But why?" she whispered.

He saw her actions and although his heart is already harden like a cold stone, he could not help but wince a little at this site. He couldn't answer this uncommon reaction his insides felt but when all is said and done, he knows that she's all that stands in the way of him and his mission. So Heero walked towards her, and wiped the tears that rolled down her supple cheek with his finger and bent close to her ear. Her intoxicating scent permeated more into his nose as he try to let her know his intentions with her "I will kill you." He whispered.

And then Heero walked off.

In the fencing hall, the instructor called Heero on to the mat. With a foil ready in hand he stepped up to face his challenge. On the mat with him was a boy of impeccable ignorance. Charles Von Bueller. The reputation that surrounds him is that Charles is the son of a Dutch Multi-Millionaire chemical arms mogul. The Von Bueller chemical plants are known world wide for the excellent quality in biological weapons manufacturing. It's also rumored that Charles will be the new head of the chemical weapons empire should his father retire. Charles slicked back his sunny blonde hair and eyed his opponent with what looked like disdain. The two faced off and at the sound of the instructor, they began to fight.

"I heard all about it, Heero" Charles began, "Tearing up Miss Relena's invitation in front of her eyes. Why did you do such a cruel thing?" he swung right and Heero blocked "As a classmate of hers, I disapprove of what you did to her. Don't you think that was shameful?"

Heero caught an open spot and managed to disarm Charles of his weapon. "Next time," Heero began, dark Prussian eyes glaring daggers at the young man, "tell me ahead of time. I'll decline your invitation instead."

After school, he went back to his dorm and opened his laptop. First order of business was to see if all the necessary business with the Saint Gabriel Institute was covered. After that, he checked his email. The only e-mail he had was a letter with the subject "Lost your toy? Find a way to get it back. Click here" by the Good Doctor at the Big Boy's Toys. Heero's raised an eyebrow. 'Lost my toy? I don't remember me going to this site' then his eyes narrowed at the subject heading. "The Good Doctor." He murmured. Then his lips formed a small line. 'Dr. J'

He clicked open the e-mail and the message went as read:

_So you lost your toy and you want it back. Well looking for it isn't hard!_

_Just look in the deep and so you'll see it whole and not in shards!_

_The Bad Boys want it, they're greedy cause they're bad,_

_So you'll need something of theirs to make them quite sad._

_Something big, something huge, something that'll make them run,_

_If you find their special toys, you'll see that the search will be fun._

_Sincerely,_

_The Good Doctor_

Well, Heero understood that 'the bad boys' were the Federation and OZ and he understood that once found, they'll desire to have the Wing Gundam. But what he didn't understand was the last part. '_Something big, something huge, something that'll make them run, If you find their special toys, you'll see that the search will be fun.' _What does that mean?

He could assume that 'Their' toys might mean their mobile suits. He went to the Federation website and managed to hack into their site and the arms inventory file. He had in mind their mobile suits but as his eyes roamed the rows of arms his eyes stopped and widen at a certain row

F-16 Missiles. Newly acquired by the Federation, California, United States base. Quantity: 27

Heero stood silent as the kinks in his brain started to formulate a plan. He smirked. The bad boys will get a big surprise when he gets his hands on their 'special toys'

Federation Naval base

Okinawa, Japan

10:23 PM

He hadn't figure that breaking into the base would be this easy. At his arrival, he immediately noticed their border flaws and used it to his advantage. Explosions rocked the base but this time, it had nothing to do with Heero. He figured it'd suit him just fine since the soldiers will focus on that and not on the task Heero sets out to do. He located the missiles and reset it with an encrypted disk so that when Heero pressed his detonator, it'll trigger Wing's self-destruct device. Detonator in hand, he stood back and realized what was before him, the opportunity for his own demise. His heart leapt at the idea. "Heero! I know it is you, Heero. Don't do it, Heero." A voice said. No more pain, or suffering. He held the detonator in his palm and waited for his desire to become a reality.

"Heero, what are you doing here? And who are you? Those are missiles, aren't they? I just want to know more about you. Talk to me, Heero!"

Flowers. Her. He turned and found her standing behind him in a lovely blue gown. He paused for moment and reminded himself that today was her birthday, which explains the dress. She said something, but strangely he wasn't aware of what exactly she said. Instead, he noticed how the moonlight hit her eyes just right bringing out the sky blue color in her orbs and how her lips her wet with gloss. She looked so innocent and sweet and he noticed that.

"Relena..." he whispered.

"Heero..."

Then in an instant, he scolded himself 'She'll turn you in! Do something about it!' and so he brought out the pistol that was tucked away in the small of his back and pointed at her pretty face. "You know too much! Goodbye, Relena!"

Suddenly, he felt himself being flung back. Pain radiated through his arm. He was shot, but by who? He heard another voice from across the area "Heero!" she yelled out

Heero raised his head "Who?"

"Obviously you are the bad guy here, aren't you? Are you alright, Miss?" the voice said. It was a young man the same age as Heero. He hid part of his face behind the flap of his black cap and the only thing that appeared was a jovial smile plastered on his young face. The young man raised his head and laid his violet-blue eyes on the two in front of him.

Heero looked at the guy before him and growled.

"Are you alright, Heero? Relena asked as she rushed towards him but Heero saw this small pause as a chance to get his gun, which flew out of his hand when he was shot.

The young man's gun shot off again "Don't hurt yourself any further."

"That's enough!" Relena yelled out, her voice showing signs of her trying to restraint from shaking, "Why did you have to hurt him?" she ask the mysterious stranger.

"Hey, wait a second," The stranger said, shocked at the tone of her voice. If he didn't hear correctly, it sounded like she didn't want to be saved "Damn, so I'm the bad guy now...?" he asked incredulously.

Near Heero now, Relena tore off a piece of her blue silk gown and wrapped Heero's gunshot wounds. His mind was at all places at the same time. He planned to blow up the base and Wing but now he couldn't figure out why Relena is trying to heal his wounds after all he did to her. Or who this stranger is. He snuck a glance to the young man across from him. His voice, his facial appearance, he's not Japanese at all. Like Relena, the young man is Caucasian and from the sound of his voice, Heero mentally wagers that he's an American. One would assume the stranger to be part of the soldiers in this base considering its military history, however the priest-like outfit the stranger is wearing causes Heero to believe otherwise.

And what of Relena? Why is she doing this? Why doesn't she just leave him be and stop haunting him with her scent and her voice and her body? He knows that he can never have her and that's what fuels his anger towards her. She's young, pretty and sexless and he knows it. He's destined to die without ever having the pleasure to devour her skin for that, for the unfairness life had dealt him he aches to die.

Throughout the base, a shrill alarm echoed. The young man in black perked up his head "Oops, already here? I may have miscalculated the high tide..."

Close by, Wing Gundam rose from the ocean like a leviathan from the deeps. Relena's insides dropped "What is that! Ah!" a blinding light filled the air causing Relena to close her eyes to save them from becoming blind.

"I can't let you see it. Miss, I don't know what's going on here, but you'd better go home now. It's for your own sake." Said the stranger in black holding the lighting mechanism.

It this point, Heero sees an opportunity to complete this mission. The detonator sits close by and Heero makes the lunge to grab it.

The stranger in black shoots again "Hey, back off!" he yelled.

"That's my Mobile Suit!" Heero yelled as he launches the missiles at Wing and another black Gundam.

"What are you doing, you bastard!" the stranger yelled out in a panic.

Heero then runs out and jumps off the base and into the black waters below. Sinking, he closes his eyes and smiles "This is... the end... Mission complete." He said talking about the mission and his life.

Date: Unknown

Location: Unknown

"Breathing rate: 27" a man in a lab coat said.

'Am I dead?' Heero thought and then felt bands around his wrist and legs. He was strapped to the bed 'No. Damn it.'

"Pulse rate: 57"

'Where am I then? Am I captured...?'

"Body temperature: 34.5 degrees and rising..." the voice said again, but then stopped, his breath caught in a small gasp in his throat.

"What is it?" a female voice said

The man hesitated and meekly, he looked at the blonde woman, garbed in a Federation uniform, to his side "I… I thought he moved."

The blonde woman eyed the boy on the slab with her slanted blue eyes "Keep monitoring him"

Heero peered his eyes opened in small slits to take a quick glance of his surroundings. In the room, there were computers, sterile medical equipment, and surgical tools set in its appropriate places. 'The third Federation Naval Hospital' he surmised considering the hospital nearest to the Naval base he was infiltrating. 'District J-B South... 50th floor, Intensive Care Unit...' considering the state of his condition and his studying of the Naval base grounds when he hacked into the Federation's system.

Behind the safety of a mirror, the doctor and the female Federation solider examine the patient strapped to the bed. A small ring broke through the silence and the doctor picked up. He then turned to the woman beside him, the phone in his hand "Major Sally, it's a call for you."

Sally took the phone "Major Sally Po speaking."

"Ma'am, That disk you gave me is impossible to analyze. It can't be opened with any access code I can think of."

"The boy had it. I thought the Federation's main computer is supposed to be able to open any file..."

The doctor spoke up "So, do you think he is one of the secret agents of the rebels?"

Sally shook her head "Let's not jump to conclusions." Then she looked at Heero through the mirror, her voice in a low awe "That boy's body is just incredible. Over 200 traces of small broken bones, yet the only visible scar on his body is that gun wound... He had to have had quite an abnormal childhood."

"Shall we use mind relaxant drugs?" the doctor asked

"No!" Sally said "I don't want to use such a strong poison on a boy that age."

In the room, Heero pulls at the restraints in an attempt to break free. But his muscles are still weak and all the pulling was done in vain.

To his side, a computer monitor came to life and on it was the stranger in black that appeared back in the naval base. The stranger made a gesture for Heero to stay quiet and whispered "Even a man like you know when to keep silent. I'm sure you're a well-trained soldier like myself. You must be able to read my lips, right? What a guy! You've been awake all this time without changing your pulse or breathing pattern. Impressive." Then the stranger shrugged "I'd like to ask you some questions. And if you'd like, I'll help you get out of here."

And so Heero waited for the stranger to come and release him. He guessed that he's a solider like him. He closed his eyes in the attempt to remember the black gundam that was on a ship near the naval base before he blew it up. Was that his? And if so, were there more gundam pilots such as he? Why wasn't he made aware of it and did Dr. J know about this? He mentally growled at this and decided to stay still again.

Relena. She came into his mind again. Her voice echo in his psyche; soft and delicate like her body. It's been so long and he would be lying if he didn't hearken back to his dream before he left when he saw her again. She was so prim and proper and so innocent. Her eyes bore through him and that, for some reason, sends a sense of alarm in him. She cannot have that much power over him could she? If he kills her not for the mission, he would kill her simply rid himself of her controlling beauty.

In his heart, he winced at the thought, which left him asking himself why? 'I will kill her' he said to himself and again he winced again 'what? I… I have to…'

His thoughts cut short when an explosion rocked the room. Through the smoke came the stranger in black "Hey!" the stranger yelled out "Get ready, man!" as he ran over to the strapped young man on the bed and pulled out a knife from his pocket. Frustrated and in a panic, he said, "Damn, how does this work?"

"Just give me the knife." Heero said angrily, "I can do it." The stranger handed the knife to Heero a within a heartbeat, he managed to free himself from the straps.

"Hey, your arm!" The stranger said, amazed, "What a guy!" Heero got out of the bed and received a backpack from the stranger. A puzzled look crossed his face as he tosses the stranger a glance. The stranger answered, "We're on the 50th floor, pal, and there's federation soldiers on our asses, we can't exactly waltz right out the front door." He said with a dark smile. "When I say so, pull the cord and a parachute will guide you down to the ground. Come on."

The two ran out to the corridor. Around the bend were armed soldiers firing shots at the two. The stranger pulled out a small device and threw it at the window at the end of the corridor. The device hit the glass and exploded. The two jumped out of the gaping hole and plummeted. The stranger in black pulled on the cord from his backpack and his parachute unfolded. "Now!" he yelled but when he heard nothing, he turned to his side to see Heero, eyes closed and freely falling.

In Heero's mind, he paid no attention to the young man next to him, yelling at him to open his parachute. He paid no attention to everything around him. In another few seconds, another few heartbeats, he is so close to being splattered all along the concrete, a mess of brain, bone and gore. In his demise, he'll take his own pain. There will be nothing to stop him.

"Heero!" her voice yelled out, "No! Heero!"

Now at this point, he didn't know what prompt him to do it, but he knew that he must not die. Not like this. So he opened his eyes and in a flash, he reached from behind his pack and pulled the cord. But it was too late, as soon at the parachute opened, he hit a cliff and landed on the sands of a beach. An incomprehensible amount of pain shot up his leg as he tossed his head back and groaned. His right leg has been dislocated from his joint. He looked all around "I... What am I doing here?" he said weakly. Into his line of sight, the stranger came into focus

"I know you'd rather die..." he said, his voice flat and monotone "But if you couldn't die after all that, you'd better come up with a really good way to kill yourself." Then he sighed in a tired tone, "I know it may sound corny, but all you can do right now is to trust me."

"My…. Leg. My leg…" Heero grinded out between clenched teeth.

The stranger frowned at the figure on the floor then looked out onto the sea and smiled at a ship over yonder. "Great" he said with much satisfaction. The stranger turned to Heero who was still on the ground trying to bear with the pain "Hey, buddy. See that ship over there?" he said, jerking his thumb towards a large commercial ship "That's my ship. Our machines are over there being fixed as we speak. Come on, I'll help you take you there."

"Wait." He growled out. Taking quick short breaths in an attempt to speak though the pain "Who are you?"

The stranger tossed him a bright, jovial glance "Oh, me? Duo Maxwell's the name. I'll cheat, I'll steal, but I'll never lie." Duo then took out a radio transmission device and gave Heero a look that begs to pardon him for a second "S.S. Grim Reaper, this is Raven. The wheat has been harvested and ready to take home to Mother, over."

There was a small static before "Copy that, Raven. Mother's sending the tractor to bring it home, over."

"Copy, over and out." Duo ended and places the radio back in his pocket. "Listen, man, my ship is sending some guys over to pick us up, so until then, we gotta lay low."

"How long?" Heero growled.

"Hm… from where the ship is to the shore, I'd say a good 30 minutes, max." Duo bent to take Heero's right arm.

"What are you doing?"

"What does it look like? I'm helping you out. We can't just sit around here and wait for OZ soldiers to come by and arrest our sorry asses, now do we? And plus from the look of things, you won't be doing much running if worst comes to worst. Now, come on, swallow that pride and let's get going."


End file.
